Recently I was overwhelmingly tempted to reply to someone's restriction post with a TMD Oracle non-response, but, since I repressed the urge then, I felt it would be excellent to dig up a few restriction-related funnies from the past.
(about Smmenen) "Semen man makes me think about quitting Magic once a week."
"I would welcome a DCI ruling that French cards cannot attack."
"I'll wait for Smmenen and Rakso to tell me what to think before I reply. Then I'll do what Smmenen says as he is right even if I don't like it. Then I'll complain about Wizards because they are doing nothing/something about Type I and are releasing no/too many Type I quality cards. Then I'll probably vote for the 'fear' thing so I can pretend I understand it like all proper TMD members. Then I'll mention something about allowing Portal and Starter in Type I (before the argument 'because Type I is where ALL cards are allowed' falls down) and someone replies with a comment about Jungle Lion or a really bad tutor. Then I'll post something off-topic and people will think I'm Dutch not Slovak. Finally I will make personal comments about anyone who disagrees with me after slagging someone off for making personal comments."
"Because seriously, a good restriction argument needs inflated rhetoric, false analogies, radical policy tangents by underinformed posters, discussions of who actually liked the Urza-era, citations of "supporting"/"similar" past restrictions, AND suggestions that all of the participants go play Type Two if they can't handle the heat, as a minimum just for it to register on the Fun-O-Meter."
"I just want to make sure that there is no confusion about the intention behind the b/r list changes. It was Madness that they needed to kill, Long was just collateral damage. Has Long ever won a tournament? Because I know that Madness has won at least 3, probably more. I can only vouch for 3 because I have only won 3 myself."
"Mana Drain and Daze are like the SR-71 and a kite."
Azhrei: "I swear it's things like this that make me glad I don't play anymore. I'm talking abstract theory and offering my opinion about the most effective way to keep the format under control (AND THEREFORE MAKE ***EVERYONE*** HAPPY), and suddenly I'm compared to the Spanish slaughtering the Aztecs? What the fuck is wrong with you people?"
Zherbus: "Wow, Darren. I identify with you so much right now...I'd kinda like to make love to you tonight."
Toaddy: what is sligh?
jeek[TF]: Toaddy: MonoR Aggro/Burn
Toaddy: omg
Toaddy: looks so bad
jeek[TF]: Dies to CoP: Red.
TheAlpha: (20:18:21) <+Toaddy> what is sligh? ---> that will be my quote of the day
KowalLazy: Toaddy, that's what it means when your opponent plays a mountain against you and doesn't play a Goblin Welder
TheAlpha: who plays cop's anyways xx(
thecapn: lol
Toaddy: mountains and NO goblin welders? :
Toaddy: :(
TheAlpha: welder > *
Toaddy: that sucks
KowalLazy: BASIC mountains, too.
Toaddy: every deck should splash red for Welder
KowalLazy: The kind that don't tap for blue.
Toaddy: mountains that don't tap for U ?
Toaddy: OMG
Toaddy: :<
TheAlpha: like only 5 nonbasics.dec..... sux:)
jeek[TF]: Volcanic Mountains > Mountains
TheAlpha: obv.
Toaddy: i thought basic lands were restricted
