Team Southpaw started testing for SCG: Chicago at least 6 weeks in advance. We built Brassman Gifts Belcher, Oath (with Black for Duress, Demonic Tutor, Yawgmoth’s Will, etc.), Control Slaver, Roland Chang’s 5-color Stax, Vroman’s Mono-Red UbaStax, 5-color Worldgorger Dragon, JDizzle's 2-Land Belcher & our own Southpaw UB Fish.Â
The first version of Southpaw UB Fish was invented by my teammate & roommate, Evan Riley, and was tweaked and tested by Evan & myself. Here are the 75 cards that our members of Team Southpaw sleeved up for SCG: Chicago:
Southpaw UB Fish
By: Evan Riley
4 Underground Sea
4 Polluted Delta
4 Mishra’s Factory
4 Wasteland
1 Strip Mine
1 Island
1 Swamp
1 Black Lotus
1 Mox Sapphire
1 Mox Jet
1 Ancestral Recall
1 Time Walk
4 Standstill
3 Brainstorm
4 Force of Will
3 Daze
3 Duress
2 Chain of Vapor
1 Rushing River
1 Stifle
4 Withered Wretch
4 Dark Confidant
4 Mesmeric Fiend
3 Null Rod
Sideboard:
4 Energy Flux
2 Annul
2 Chain of Vapor
2 Stifle
2 Darkblast
3 Old Man of the Sea
After many matches of testing, our UB Fish deck had the following match win percentages:
Vs. Control Slaver: 9-1 (90%)
Vs. Brassman Gifts: 9-1 (90%)
Vs. Oath of Druids: 7-3 (70%)
Vs. Vroman UbaStax: 5-5 (50%)
Vs. Chang 5C Stax: 6-4 (60%)
Vs. 5-color Dragon: 8-2 (80%)
Vs. 2-Land Belcher: 7-3 (70%)These win percentages are retarded. They cannot be representative. Either you're lying, you've been playing very few games, or your opponent is really, really bad. In order to prevent exactly such discussion, we have a policy against posting win percentages. Please refrain from this in the future. - BramAfter all of the testing, Southpaw UB Fish showed high win percentages against the Blue-based control decks and decent win percentages against Mishra’s Workshop based decks. The deck uses Withered Wretch to deny any graveyard use and Null Rod alone beats 2-Land Belcher and Withered Wretch beats 5-color Dragon. Dark Confidant is the heart and soul of this deck. He’s a 2/1 beater with Phyrexian Arena stapled to his head. Since the deck only runs 5 cards that have a converted casting cost of 3 or higher, the life-loss drawback is a non-issue. If Dark Confidant ends up killing you while playing this deck, you weren’t going to win that game anyways.
My only concern with the deck was the relatively low win percentage against Mishra’s Workshop based decks. Chicago is known as a Mishra’s Workshop convention. After Oath showing up in large numbers, perhaps Chicago will now be known as Oath’s Forbidden Orchard. Anyways, I didn’t feel that the deck had a solid enough match up against Mishra’s Workshop decks to play in what I expected to be a 30% Stax metagame (I think we all misjudged the metagame). Two members of Team Southpaw ran Southpaw UB Fish, Evan Riley & David Spiehler.
I, on the other hand, had no idea what to play. I didn’t want to play Gifts, CS, or UB Fish. I decided at 2:00 p.m. on Friday that I wanted to play Vroman’s UbaStax because of its high win percentages against Gifts & 5-color Stax. I called Vroman on Friday at about 4:00 p.m. and he gave me the list that he expected to run. I was impressed with Vroman’s willingness to give his list to a non-teammate the day before a SCG event. I salute you Mr. Vroman.
Uba Stax
By: Robert Vroman
4 Mishra’s Workshop
4 Bazaar of Baghdad
4 Barbarian Ring
3 Mountain
4 Wasteland
1 Strip Mine
1 Black Lotus
5 Moxen
1 Sol Ring
1 Mana Vault
1 Mana Crypt
4 Chalice of the Void
4 Crucible of Worlds
4 Uba Mask
4 Smokestacks
3 Null Rod
1 Trinisphere
1 Wheel of Fortune
4 Goblin Welder
2 Gorilla Shaman
2 Duplicant
1 Solemn Simulacrum
Sideboard:
2 Tormod’s Crypt
2 Duplicant
2 Maze of Ith
2 Pyroclasm (Vroman ran Stoneshaker Shaman)
3 Viashino Heretic
4 Pyroblast
Team Southpaw boarded our privately owned jet (better known as my '96 Accord) and headed for Chicago around 7:00 p.m. (Indiana time). Somehow, the first 3 1/2 hours of the trip go by rather quickly and the last hour seems as long as the first 3 1/2 hours. We roll into Chicago at about 10:15 p.m. (Indiana time) and immediately proceed to get stuck in construction traffic. We get lost on the way to our friend's house but manage to get back on track through the use of some expert sextant techniques (Also aided via a cell phone call to our friend). We drink some beer and play test. I always manage to sleep less than 4 hours before a Magic tourney and this was to be no exception. I fall asleep around 3:30 a.m. (Further times are Chicago time) and wake up without an alarm at 7:00 a.m. It's amazing how I can get 8 hours of sleep the night before work and sleep through my alarm. When I'm getting up for a Magic tourney, I don't even need an alarm.
We get up, head to Pastimes and hit the Jewel-Osco on the way. As an important side note, I bought a 1/2-Gallon of Orange Juice at the Osco, which turned out to be savage tech. I highly recommend getting your Vitamin C before any major event.
We get to Pastimes at about 8:30 a.m. to grab the extra cards I need for UbaStax. UbaStax is considered to be 14 proxies (5 Moxen, 1 Lotus, 4 Workshop, 4 Bazaar). Fortunately, I was able to get 2 pieces of power from my teammates since they were playing UB Fish and I own a Mox Sapphire. This put me at 13 proxies, 1 short of the needed amount. I tried to trade for Moxen but surprisingly, nobody wanted Mana Drains. I got lucky and ran into JDizzle, who had won a Workshop the weekend before at Vroman’s tournament. JD, who I had only met the Saturday before at Indiana Champs, agreed to hold on to 4 of my Mana Drains in exchange for letting me use the Workshop in the tournament. I was finally ready to go.
Round 1: Worldgorger Dragon
Game 1:
I have a good hand that involves a turn 1 Uba Mask + Bazaar. He takes about 7 minutes to Lim-Dul’s Vault. He’s quite possibly the slowest WGD player ever. I’m holding him on 2 mana (Orchard + COB) with Null Rod when I draw a Wheel of Fortune. He’s tapped out, has WGD and Sliver Queen in the GY. I know that if I let him untap with his grip of 6 cards, I’m dead. I weld out Null Rod for a Sol Ring to play the Wheel. I draw a bunch of good cards, play a Smokestax, Workshop & Crucible. He untaps, top-decks an Animate Dead and makes infinite 1/1’s to beat my ass.
SB:
-1 Jens, -1 Chalice of the Void
+2 Tormod’s Crypt
Game 2:
I have another good hand and drop Uba Mask on turn 1 or 2. I start drawing crazy with Bazaar and lock him out without much trouble after 15-20 minutes of him taking time to think about nothing.
Game 3:
He opens with: Mox, Bazaar, Draw 2, Discard WGD & something. I go turn 1 Uba Mask. He frowns, untaps and animates WGD. He then proceeds to draw out the game since he can’t win under Uba Mask. He will never have any other creature in the GY to animate so he can’t stop the combo to hardcast his win-condition. We call the judge over, the judge confirms that this game is a draw and gives us 3 minutes of extra time.
Game 4:
Our time extention ends as he is stalling while taking a mulligan. He opens with some cards and I play Uba Mask on turn 2. As he had done many times earlier in the match, he draws directly to his hand while Uba Mask is in play. At this point, I’ve had enough. I call a judge and he gets a game-loss for creating an irreversible game state.
I hated doing this, but he was obviously stalling games 2-4, drew game 3 so he wouldn’t lose and was an asshole to boot. After the match he told me I was cheesy for calling the judge. C’est la vie.
Round 2: 5-Color Stax (Finished 2nd place)
Game 1:
I have a good hand of Workshop, Barb Ring, Crucible, Wasteland, Stax, etc. He has a better hand of turn 1 Welder & Vamp Tutor. Turn 2 Triskelion. I try my hardest to ramp Smoky to make him sac the Trike, but I end up a turn too late.
SB:
-2 Uba Mask, -1 Duplicant
+3 Viashino Heretic
Game 2:
I have another good hand. He has another better hand. All I have to say is that he played these cards: Turn 1 – Viashino Heretic. Turn 2 – Sacred Ground. Turn 3 – Smokestacks. Turn 4 – Triskelion. I lose to those cards.
Round 3: Chalice Oath
Game 1:
He gets a bunch of bad cards with mana screw and I beat him after mulling to 5.
SB:
-2 Welder, -3 Null Rod, -1 Jens
+2 Maze of Ith, +2 Duplicant, +2 Pyroblast
Game 2:
I keep a decent hand with Duplicant, mana to cast him on turn 2, and Maze of Ith. I top-deck like 6 mana sources in a row and Akroma kills me.
Game 3:
I open with a god draw of turn 1 smokey and wasteland. He promptly runs out of permanents and starts discarding. I kill him soon enough.
Round 4: Gifts
Game 1:
I start with turn 1 Uba Mask and lock him out before he can really get anything going.
SB:
-1 Jens, -1 Uba Mask, -2 Crucible, -2 Chalice of the Void
+2 Tormod’s Crypt, +4 Pyroblast
Game 2:
One of my best opening hands of the day: Workshop, Black Lotus, Welder, Welder, Mox Monkey, Uba Mask, Bazaar. I play Workshop, Lotus, Crack Lotus for RRR, Welder to see if he has FOW – he doesn’t, Uba Mask. I’m now left with a tough play-call. I have R in my pool with Mox Monkey & Welder in hand. If I play the second Welder, I can lock out his draws with Uba Mask. On the other hand, Mox Monkey ensures that he doesn’t get to use any artifact mana. I decide to play Mox Monkey and pass the turn. He Burning Wishes for Pyroclasm and I feel like a pro. After he Pyroclasms away my Welder and Mox Monkey, I play the second Welder from my hand and win shortly after.
Round 5: Oath
We sit down and start shuffling. Before we get to offer our decks for the cut, a judge comes over to inform us that we are randomly being deck-checked. After the judge confirms my list, he suggests that I re-sleeve my deck. I re-sleeve it in new sleeves and go back to the table.
Game 1:
He does exactly what I don’t want him to do. Turn 1 – Orchard, Mox, Oath. As an insult to injury, he casts Ancestral Recall after oathing up Razia.
SB:
Doesn’t matter
Game 2:
I play Turn 1 Welder with Null Rod, Smokestacks, Uba Mask in hand. Perhaps it was a risky play, but I wanted to lock him out of drawing an Oath if he didn’t have it in hand. He did – Turn 1 Land, Mox, Time Walk. Time Walk Turn – Oath, Ancestral Recall.
At this point I’m a bit pissed that I didn’t really get to play anything during the two matches I lost, but whatever.
Round 6: Metalworker Combo
Game 1:
He mulls to 5 and plays Vault of Whispers and passes the turn. I play some good cards and waste his Vault. He misses his next land drop and I get Crucible + Wasteland online. I win without him really doing anything.
SB:
I thought he was playing Affinity since I saw him discard a Frogmite
-2 Duplicant, -2 Uba Mask,
+2 Maze of Ith, +2 Pyroblast
Game 2:
I draw the best opening hand I’ve seen all day: Barb Ring, Mana Crypt, Mox, Mox, Welder, Stax, Something. He plays Turn 1 Mishra’s Workshop, Metalworker. I drop my hand except for 1 card plus the card I drew for the turn. He untaps, activates Metalworker, drops Staff of Domination and kills me.
SB:
-2 Maze of Ith, -1 Jens
+2 Uba Mask, +1 Pyroblast
Game 3:
I look at a hand: Workshop, Workshop, Chalice, Chalice, Crucible, Stax, Something. I think about holding both of my chalices to set them both at 3 but decide to drop a chalice for 0 to cut off any artifact mana. He plays Workshop, Metalworker. I try to drop Chalice for 3 but it gets FOWed. He untaps, activates Metalworker, drops Staff and kills me again.
All in all, I was happy and upset about how I lost my matches. I may have made a play mistake Game 1 against 5-color Stax, but I’m not sure. I don’t feel that I made more than 2 play mistakes, but that’s why they call it Type 1.
We stayed to watch T8 and then left. Congrats to Evan Riley for piloting Southpaw UB Fish to 11th place, but next time don't let someone take back a play mistake (it cost him a draw in round 3 instead of a win). Congrats to Vroman for winning yet another Black Lotus. How many do you need you greedy bastard?Â
After we left Pastimes, the real fun began. Firstly, the trip took 30 minutes max to get to Pastimes. It took us 1 to 1 ½ hours to find our way back. Secondly, when we got back, our friend had locked the door and was at some bar. We looked around for a way to get in.
Our friend lives on the third floor, and there was a window in the hallway somewhat near a window in his apartment. Evan wanted to imitate Spiderman and got out on the window ledge. The whole time he’s on this third floor window ledge, I’m yelling at him, “This is a bad idea. If you fall, I’m not taking you to the hospital. I’ll get lost.� Fortunately, he couldn’t reach the other window and we looked for another way in.
I saw that the door was rather old and went to work trying to take the handle out of the door with a makeshift screwdriver made from a metal piece of a pen cap. I got the outside handle off the door but it wouldn’t push through to give me a hole to reach through. I decided that it would be a good idea to bend the metal plate that was around the door handle and deadbolt. I really jacked the door up.
Then we decide to try to take the window above the door out. At this point, Evan is asleep on the stairs. I wake him up, give him some car keys and tell him to get on my shoulders. So here I am, in the middle of some apartment building in Chicago, with Evan on my shoulders scraping the grout off a window with some car keys so that we can break in. I’m glad our friend’s neighbors weren’t home.
After chipping away almost all of the grout, most of which ended up in my hair and all over the floor in front of the door, Evan says, “Shean, you’re an idiot.� The damn window was on hinges and pushed in.
We get inside, order two pizzas for the reasonable price of $35 and play some Magic. The next day we wake up, play some chess, darts & Magic, and go home.
Props:
Vroman for giving me his list and letting me see his registration sheet before he turned it in.
JDizzle for letting me use his Workshop.
Evan Riley for taking his rogue deck to a major event and doing well.
Slops:
Chicago for looking the same everywhere, its retarded street signs & overpriced pizza
The people of Chicago for their lack of driving skills
The dude who I played against in round 1 for stalling
Pastimes for kicking Kevin Cron out (We signed your shirt Kevin!)
-Mike Shean
