Time Travel?

[Jacob Orlove]

[Toad]

<3 

[dandan]

You are fooling nobody. If you had time travel you would own far more Alpha/Beta cards and would have hassled Wizards into a decent Time Vault errata in 1994!!!

[Jacob Orlove]

You are fooling nobody. If you had time travel you would own far more Alpha/Beta cards and would have hassled Wizards into a decent Time Vault errata in 1994!!!

Okay, first of all, I did a lot better than magic cards with my time travel investing, and second, trust me, that TV errata was better than the alternative.

[dandan]

Better than Magic cards?

[Jacob Orlove]

Better than Magic cards?

Magic cards are way too small-scale for any kind of serious returns.

[Anusien]

Remember, Jacob is an economics major.  I think he's been prospecting oil.

[Godder]

Buried treasure! So, Jacob, when are you going on your next "salvage" mission?

And Magic cards? Pshaw, if you're going to do collectibles, do it right.

[BigMac]

Buy the right pottery. Believe me, it can cost so much you will get tears in your eyes when you see the price and what the little pot looks like. But a great investment you will never feel sorry about when you sell it eventually.

[SpencerForHire]

Buy the right pottery. Believe me, it can cost so much you will get tears in your eyes when you see the price and what the little pot looks like. But a great investment you will never feel sorry about when you sell it eventually.

I would say 3/4 of the people that do this for prophet buy fakes..  And get a big surprise when they have it appraised.

[Bram]

You're all looking at it the wrong way around. You guys wanna go to the past, pick up something of future value, and sell it here. That's not the way Jacob tangoes.

I don't think I will be breaching my contract with Jacob by disclosing that the real reason he visited me a while back was to set up a collaboratiion between one of my construction firms, the US government, and his time travel technology R&D lab. The resulting joint venture is called 'Temporal Engineering' (by the way, look for a magic card of this name to appear in the third expansion of 2008). We secured a field in Afghanistan and using Jacob's expertise, we constructed a pipeline that pumps oil into the future.

Since it is the most valuable commodety over there, we can basically get whatever price we ask for. It's the ultimate monopoly! Payment was a slight problem initially, because Reunited States Dollars tend not to get accepted here (and carbon dating them turns up a negative number). We were paid out in diamonds for a while, but when the world's supply had depleted, we switched to just being mega rich in the future (hence my frequent two week absences from these boards....I'm usually lying on some Bahama beach with Dandan's incredibly hot superstar grand grand grand grand grand granddaughter Yvana).

[Jacob Orlove]

I can neither confirm nor deny any of the above.

This, however, was supposed to be a secret, but it looks like we've already gone public: http://www.futurefeedforward.com/about.php (be sure to check out the innovations page in particular).

That whole "selling money at a discount" thing is just so cute. I keep telling them that relativistic-speed travel and money only coexist for a few centuries, but they'd rather mine that out than deal with nonhuman intelligences. Eh, at least this way I can check my umail without the two millenia jump.

[dandan]

I'm usually lying on some Bahama beach with Dandan's incredibly hot superstar grand grand grand grand grand granddaughter Yvana).

Now we know you are lying. The Slovak spelling is Ivana.

How is Dutchieland doing in the future what with rising sea levels and the like? (Ditto the Bahamas)

[Bram]

Now we know you are lying. The Slovak spelling is Ivana.

Are you kidding? It's a bloody miracle that I remembered her name at all. How am I supposed to know how to spell it? It's not like we spent our time writing letters to eachother or anything.

How is Dutchieland doing in the future what with rising sea levels and the like? (Ditto the Bahamas)

Well, Jacob bought me the Bahamas, which now have Climate Protection (tm) so they're basically unchanged, only now noone lives there anymore. In return, Jacob made me promise not to visit The Netherlands or look up any information concerning it. I have no idea why, though. But whatever.

I can neither confirm nor deny any of the above.

It's OK, Jacob. The beauty of our setup is that they won't believe us anyway.

I keep telling them that relativistic-speed travel and money only coexist for a few centuries, but they'd rather mine that out than deal with nonhuman intelligences.

It seems Jacob has some projects on the side. Maybe he can go further into the future than he led me to believe. He talks about nonhuman intelligences, but the point in time he took me to only had nonintelligent humans.
 

[Jacob Orlove]

It seems Jacob has some projects on the side.

Yeah, yours. :p

[dandan]

Any chance you could go back to Loughborough University 1987 when I've just taken a hot girl back to my room and advise me that there are better things to do than play computer games?

[Bram]

Sheesh, people seem to think time travel is a sort of panacea, don't they?

Dandan, imagine the situation. You're sitting in your dorm room playing Super Mario with a girl you like. You heard a knock on the door. You open it, only to find an oddly dressed** Jewish guy you've never seen before on your doorstep. Before you can ask if you can help him with anything, he looks around all shifty-eyed, lowers his voice, and says: "Listen Dandan, you big fish, I know you don't know me yet but we'll meet in a few years over a medium that doesn't exist yet which was founded primarily to discuss a game that doesn't exist yet either. But anyway, you told me to come here and force you to have sex with whatever girl you currently have in your room."

Because THAT, my friend, is what you would have been faced with. And I don't know about you, but in that situation, I'd have slammed the door in his face so hard, there'd still be a beard imprint in there.




** = because it's 20 years ago, not because Jacob dresses strange, obviously.

[Jacob Orlove]

Any chance you could go back to Loughborough University 1987 when I've just taken a hot girl back to my room and advise me that there are better things to do than play computer games?

Okay, first you have me go to great lengths to make sure that all you do that night is play computer games, and now you want me to undo all my hard work? That girl was trouble, and according to you, you would have been (or, currently, are) better off without her.