Donkey Punch

[Anonymous]

I orginally jokingly called this deck Truck Stop, then I thought since it makes a big ass pony and swings with it, I could call it Donkey Show.  Then the voice of south park came through to me.  Donkey Punch.

DONKEY PUNCH

Card Drawing Engine (9)
4 Land Tax
3 Scroll Rack
2 Claws of Gix

Life gain and Armor Pump (7)
4 Ivory Tower
3 Library of Leng

Critter Control (7)
2 Humility
1 Abyss
4 Swords to Plowshares

Solutions (3)
1 Blood Moon
1 Seal of Cleansing
1 Tormod's Crypt

Recur (6)
4 Argivian Find
2 Replenish

Da one white tutor (1)
1 Enlightened Tutor

The Donkeys! (4)
2 Sacred Mesa
2 Empyrial Armor

Mana 23
1 Sol Ring
1 Mox Pearl
1 Mox Jet
1 Mox Ruby
1 Mox Diamond
1 Lotus Petal
1 Black Lotus
1 Swamp
1 Mountain
14 Plains

SB
4 Orim's Chant
2 Bloodmoon
2 Tormod's Crypt
2 Replenish
3 Seal of cleansing
2 Abeyance

With the library discard should not be an issue.  Taxes with library gets you a sick, sick hand.  Drop armor on a pony, and just like tog you should be able to swing in one or two turns.  any thoughts?

I'm thinking about how to speed it up.  Pony-tog is what I am going for.  Quick taxes and library, tower to stabilize and make a big ass life buffer.  Make big pony...

[Anonymous]

actually, i have a question about this... I also play a deck very similar to this and was wondering what you would drop if opening hand you had a plains, tax, tower... Whish one? I would almost always go for tax, is this a good idea?

[Anonymous]

If I was going first I would drop the tower, then the tax so I would be behind in mana hopefully and tax would be active

[Anonymous]

I have been playing around w/ a varient of this deck... and i'm not so sure library of leng is pulling its waight. The only thing it did was save me from discarding some cards, which actually just slowed the deck down. I only had over 7 cards once or twice because by the time i had Tax, Tower, and Leng all on the table there wasnt much left to tax for and it was later in the game were i would rather have pulled a humilitry or story circle then the leng. Just 4 ivory towers (like I had before) seemed to do very well... wspecially when i got multiples. I just don't think that 3 card combo is quick enough in this deck unless u get an awsome hand. I still need to do some more playtesting w/ this though, so i'll tell u what happens.

[Anonymous]

Well its not really a 3 card combo.  All the cards combo together, and their summation is an uber combo.

tower+tax=good combo for life buffer

tower+library+tax=really good life buffer

library+tax=over tax all you want you don't have to discard

library+scroll rack+tax=racking a big ole hand every turn is good.

tax+rack=the colorless ancestral everyturn

tax+emperyrial armor=big pump

so you can see how all the cards work together and even pull their weight on their own.

I think maybe one armor could be cut for another seal maindeck.  one seal is scary.  I think in my next Trailer Park Parfait will try a library of leng over the ivory mask.  I love mask but I don't know if I need it main anymore since the tower life gain makes burn obsolete.  Stroke kill, crypt, and haunting echoes are worries but sideboard mask is probably good enough.

[Puschkin]

But why the Empyrial Armour? Its only useful if you have a Mesa running and in that case, shouldn´t you win anyway?

Also, all your nice little combos all consist of cards that are useless in multiples.
And since the best versions of Parfait are still the mono-white ones barring those one with the red splash for Blood Moon and nothing else, why that second splash? Also: if you have black in there, you should add Demnonic Tutor and so on.

[Anonymous]

well in reality Donkey Punch was never meant to be a serious deck.  The point of this deck is to survive just long enough to barrel over with the pony.  In testing the deck usually killed in one to two swings.  I just wanted a parfait like build that didn't bend over to time limits.  Too many players don't scoop to parfait once they are locked down.  

I would love to put a demonic tutor and maybe even a vamp in but here is the problem.  If I have an active land tax going to get the swamp to cast the DT I am probably not doing too bad.  I playtested it once and it didn't work too well, I'll try again soon.