Gay Welders:T1 Fun Deck.

The List:

4 Mishra's Factories
1 Githu Encampment
2 Faerie Conclaves
3 Wooded Foothills
3 Volcanic Islands
1 Tropical Island
2 Tiaga
1 Pendelhaven (e-bolt tech!)
1 Mountain
1 Forest

4 Elvish Spirit Guides (poor man's Time Walk)
4 Living Wish (check out my ass kicking sideboard!)

3 Goblin Welders
3 Eternal Witness
3 Thirst For Knowledge
2 Gaea's Blessing
3 Crucible of Worlds
4 Mesmeric Orbs

Singleton Welder/Mesmeric Orb Stuff
Memory Jar
Posessed Portal
Platinum Angel
Mindslaver
Azusa, Lost but Seeking
Genesis
Anger
Wheel of Fortune
Fastbond
Tinker
Lightning Greaves
Zuron Orb
Duplicant
Sundering Titan
Triskellion

Sideboard
3 Standstill (this is Gay Welders. Side in against SOME matchups...)
1 Jester's Cap
2 Artifact Mutation (ownage!)
Wishables:
1 Eternal Witness
1 Goblin Welder
1 Elf Replica (tech!)
1 Karakas (Tech!)
1 Wooden Foothills (cool...)
1 Strip Mine (Crucible Tech)
1 Maze of Ith (Aggro/Oath Tech)
1 Darksteel Colossus (hey, I fit so many goodies Maindeck...)
1 Pentavus (Crucible/Factory is Slaver Lock enough...

Okay...Gay Welders (or...Gaea Welders) is my foray into the world of Goblin Welders. As many TMDr's know, I live in a world of Salvagers and a scrub meta, but I love Magic. Enter Gay Welders. I traded for 2 Welders and eventually purchesed 2 (for 7 bucks each!) during the same thimeframe of acquiring my 3rd Gaea's Blessing and 4th Mesmeric Orb. My Salvagers Deck was successful in 2004, except in the face of Fish and better control decks (I have layed low for the last 6 months or so...but Salvagers WILL kick ass. don't you worry.)

Back to the Deck at hand: Gay Welders. Come on, you gotta love a name like Gay Welders, right? What if your pet deck DIES to Gay Welders?!

Anyways, the core of this deck archetype (yeah, it's its own archetype) involves these 7 cards:

Gaea's Blessing
Mesmeric Orb (crap rare from Mirroden: These are the 2 core Cards, Welders make it more T1ish)
Crucible of Worlds (man, this card is awesome. Welders/Crucible/Gaea's Blessing=Awesome!)
Eternal Witness (Fifth Dawn RULES! Nuff Said)
Goblin Welder (the most broken creature in T1. Made ridiculous with Mesmeric Orb in a scrub meta.)
Living Wish (come on! Look at the Sideboard!!!)
Elvish Spirit Guide (technically not neccesary if you are running power, but IS tech against Trinisphere.dec and costs $246 less than Moxes.)

Card Choices:
Factories/Conclaves/Encampments: The Factories are recursive Welder targets if Crucible is in play. They provide a function (colored mana or artifact Welder targets) and attack if neccessary (see Standstill in the sideboard: tech against non-combo decks)

Dual Lands/Fetchlands: T1
2 Basic Lands: Minimal attempt at dealing with Waste effects.

Pendelhaven: Tech against E-bolts/beats. It DOES produce green mana for Witness etc.

Elvish Spirit Guides: Technically a Time Walk for this deck, to get Mesmeric Orb online, or an emergency Witness online.

Living Wish: in a gay-ass deck like this, run as many as you can. See sideboard for proof.

3 Goblin Welders: 1 is in the sideboard. Goblin Welders: Nuff said.
Eternal Witness: Beatstick with a Regrowth effect. Good against any deck ever, AND in enables me to get Fastbond into play (in a Crucible/Fastbond/Zuron Orb deck, Fastbond is the only troublesome piece of the combo: Infinite Life/ Infinate Mana is always a good thing)

Thirst for Knowledge=Welders. Nuff Said

4 Mesmeric Orbs: This is the heart of the deck. Gay Welders can win without it, but a resolved Mesmeric Orb spells so much doom for my opponent, that only chuckling to myself can contain the pleasure of this artifact hittiing the board. Against many "real" T1 deck, this artifact merely enables an opponent's Yawgmoth's Will to end up in their graveyard (ALWAYS a good thing). other than Yawgmoth's Will, ALL, and I reapeat ALL (but Salvagers/Dragon) decks simply DIE to Mesmeric Orb's taking out a Yawgmoth's Will!!!!!!!!!! (ok, that is up to some debate. This IS casual. This IS a Mesmeric Orb deck, with Welder Backup.
(EDIT: Getting a Mesmeric Orb onto the field is almost an "I Win" situation for this deck. Every time an opponent does something, this involves Milling themselves for a certain amount of cards. This Milling affects me, but then again it doesn't, because I maindeck 2 Gaea's Blessings.

The Mesmeric Orb is almost a draw engine for this deck, as I play with 3 Welders maindeck, plus 3 Eternal Witness maindeck. If I owned a Time Walk, the fun would be quadruplefold. But the only thing better than having a Mesmeric Orb on the field is having TWO, THREE, or FOUR Mesmeric Orbs on the field (Sometimes I maindeck Sculpting Steel).

The Zuron Orb/Fastbond/Crucible of World thing happens quite a lot as I play Eternal Witness for Orbed away goodies. Also, Crucible/Welder/Mishra's Factory makes infinite Mindslaver recursion possible.

End Edit)

As for other stuff maindeck: Most of it is Welder Funness, but some cards need a tiny bit of explanation:

Anger/Genesis/Azusa,Lost but Seeking/Lightning Greaves/ Wacky Cool combo pieces with Witness/Welder stuff. Azusa is Fastbond #2 for this deck.

This deck dies to Combo. The sideboard could be accomodated to deal with it, but Gay Welders is technically budget.

All criticisms and suggestions are welcome.

Come on, GAY WELDERS?!?

Edit #2: No Love? No Hate? Two weeks and no reply? Ah, well, someday I'll break goddamned Mesmeric Orb. Just you see.

LotusHead