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jro
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« on: May 03, 2009, 01:46:45 am » |
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I was struck by an idea for a card based on flavor. I'm not sure I've ever made a card from a top-down flavor design before. The idea was for an army commander who captures Dragons and trains them to be soldiers. If anyone has advice on name or abilities, it would be appreciated.
My first idea was something like this:
Bardok, Dragon Commander
2WR
Legendary Creature - Human Soldier
Dragon creatures you control have double strike.
2/3
"Nature made them killers, I made them soliders."
I think gaining double strike conveys a sense of being trained to fight while being relatively simple. This would have to be a rare, I suppose, since it should almost certainly be legendary. I'd try to print this in a set that had a cycle of rare dragons (like Planar Chaos), so that he'd be less than totally useless in draft.
I don't like that it doesn't have any synergy with itself-- without any dragons, he's just an overcosted dude. At the same time, he shouldn't have beefy stats (he's meant to make your dragons more awesome, not be awesome himself), and shouldn't cost too little, as it wouldn't fit his character. So I thought maybe a second ability that lets you recruit dragons with him, something like:
"Shuffle a soldier creature you control into your library: Search your library for a Dragon creature card, reveal it, and put it in your hand."
or
"When ~this~ comes into play, search your library for any number of Dragon creature cards. Shuffle your library, then put those cards on top of it in any order."
I think the former is more flavorful (you send out your soldiers to bring you back a dragon), but the latter is more straightforward. Perhaps it warrants a name change? So
Bardok, Dragon Master
2WR
Legendary Creature - Human Soldier
When Bardok, Dragon Master comes into play, search your library for any number of Dragon creature cards. Shuffle your library, then put those cards on top of it in any order.
Dragon creatures you control have double strike.
2/3
"Nature made them killers, I made them soliders."
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Matt
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King of the Jews!
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« Reply #1 on: May 03, 2009, 10:43:43 am » |
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I like it!
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Wagner
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« Reply #2 on: May 03, 2009, 09:11:20 pm » |
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Since most dragons already have firebreathing, I think Double strike would be too strong. No dragon in your deck would possibly do less than 16 damage, and since they fly, it's probably game over with one attack. The flavor is nice, but it needs a major drawback for it to work that way.
+2+2 and first strike would also convey the idea of being trained and having equipment without making each dragon a must block or die.
Nice flavor text also.
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Matt
Post like a butterfly, Mod like a bee.
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King of the Jews!
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« Reply #3 on: May 04, 2009, 05:31:05 pm » |
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I like vigilance better than first strike as an indicator of "soldier training". He's bringing civilization to the dragons.  |
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http://www.goodgamery.com/pmo/c025.GIF---------------------- SpenceForHire2k7: Its unessisary SpenceForHire2k7: only spelled right SpenceForHire2k7: <= world english teach evar ---------------------- noitcelfeRmaeT {Team Hindsight}
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jro
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« Reply #4 on: May 04, 2009, 09:17:49 pm » |
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I like vigilance better than first strike. First strike is already a red ability, so the fact that this is white should let it do something that red alone wouldn't do. Vigilance is no longer a red ability (although, amusingly enough, it once was), so I like the "white part" of this spell granting that.
That said, it's a shame to not get double strike. It's the quintessential red/white ability, and double striking dragons are a lot more exciting than dragons that are a little bigger and good for blocking (yawn).
Are there any fixes that would let him keep his current abilities? Adjusting mana cost or P/T perhaps?
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andrewpate
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« Reply #5 on: May 05, 2009, 05:20:53 pm » |
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Double strike is just too much juice without costing him to oblivion (like    or something). I am right on the same page as Wagner in pointing out that the first swing will win the game most of the time. Have you ever seen a Dragon Tyrant in play? It's pretty much game over. You could look at some kind of drawback, like "Dragon spells you play cost  more to play." Since he is low on the curve, it creates tension between running him out early and curving into a fattie vs. getting the fattie at fair value and playing this guy later. It's also sort of flavorful, like the added expense of training or whatever. |
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Matt
Post like a butterfly, Mod like a bee.
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King of the Jews!
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« Reply #6 on: May 05, 2009, 06:01:49 pm » |
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"Whenever you play a Dragon creature, you pay pay  . If you do, when that creature comes into play, it gains double strike." |
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http://www.goodgamery.com/pmo/c025.GIF---------------------- SpenceForHire2k7: Its unessisary SpenceForHire2k7: only spelled right SpenceForHire2k7: <= world english teach evar ---------------------- noitcelfeRmaeT {Team Hindsight}
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Wagner
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« Reply #7 on: May 06, 2009, 12:37:50 pm » |
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"Whenever you play a Dragon creature, you pay pay . If you do, when that creature comes into play, it gains double strike." Forever? Another way to squeeze the double strike would be to put in a huge actvated ability, that could be viewed as "training the dragon". 2RRWW: Put a Training counter or all (or target) dragon(s) you control. Dragons with a training counter have Double Strike. |
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