Kind of representative of the whole weekend, wouldn't you say?
And might I say, Marc's drunken posting on IRC Saturday night was EPIC. If anyone has a log of that, please post it!
And Marc, I'm surprised that Joe's behavior justified you throwing the rest of the mac and cheese on our windshield in a fit of jealous rage at Joe's eating capacity. I'm sure this is a sign of that Southern hospitality we all hear about.
Hrm. It appears that you didn’t get the full story either Hi-Val. Understandable, since you were busy most of the evening expressing yourself artistically to the boys in the pool room, you probably heard everything second or third hand...I know you did come back upstairs for hugs at one point but I’m certain you didn’t see what really happened. There actually is a very interesting story behind both of those pictures, the one with steve holding the gun, and the one with me on the floor.
After resolving the whole Bushman situation I decided that while everyone was still in good spirits, it was a good time for some serious discussion about the future of the format that has brought us together. As you may or may not recall, Mr. Mennendian issued me a challenge to a presidential style debate on one of the threads here on TMD recently. I thought it fitting to take up the challenge. As I approached steve however, I noticed that there was something a bit off about him that evening. He was…well, ordinarily I wouldn’t talk about his “condition,� but when it becomes a danger to innocent people like it was that evening…I’m gonna go ahead and tell all of you so that you can protect yourselves should this scenario present itself again.
Many of you probably don’t know this about smmenen, and it was only through my keen intuition and acute understanding of clinical psychology that I was able to recognize this, but it is quite clear to me that steve suffers from a severe mental illness. His particular disorder as identified in the DSM IV is known as givemegirldrinkgivegivegivepu
titinmymouthiwantitrightnowih
avetohaveit-itis.
It’s a chemical imbalance in the brain that causes a kind of psychosis. The result is manic, and often violent, behavioral patterns characterized by an intense desire to consume alcoholic beverages that taste sweet and/or fruity.
Apparently steve has medication that he takes to alleviate the more dangerous symptoms, but it was quite obvious that he had not taken them. Or worse yet, perhaps he had taken the wrong meds, regardless, he was not well.
When I initially began my discussion with him, I didn’t realize quite how distressed he was. We began chatting, and it seemed pretty normal at first, just typical steve really.
“Steve, I thought it would be interesting if we had a dialogue regarding the future of the format. What say you?�
“GIRL DRINK SO MUCH IS GOOD! I WANT IT IN ME GIVE IT TO ME I AM SO DESPERATE FOR IT!�
“Indeed. I found the lack of anything but welder and oath builds in the top 8 a bit disconcerting, am I alone in this?�
“MY MOUTH SO EAGER WANTING IT! ALL OVER MY LIPS AND FACE HAVE TO HAVE! SO SAVAGE!!�
“No doubt. Some are saying that this tournament was little more than a masturbatory episode between meandeck, shortbus, and good TMDers, is that your feeling as well?�
“HAVE TO HAVE IT INSIDE OF ME! I NEED IT SO MUCH RIGHT NOW! NO MORE TALKINGS!�
At that point steve jumped up out of his seat and sprinted down the stairs toward the refrigerator in the basement where the drinks were kept. But he was stopped before he could get there by one of Shortbuses young savants, Ian Bennet. Ian, who was perfectly composed all evening just like myself, challenged Menendian to a CoK money draft. The immediacy of the challenge somehow sated steve’s lust for girl drinks temporarily. It would be a dual.
Ian and steve sat down at the coffee table and began their draft, I added an additional 10 dollars to the pot to make it more interesting. Naturally, I put my money on my teammate Ian; not only is he a shortbusser and therefore a natural talent, but Ian is a type two player and is much more familiar with the CoK card pool.
As they passed the packs back and forth, it quickly became obvious that menendian was out gunned in this event. While steve is certainly an exceptional player, his desire for girl drinks was overwhelming his ability to think. This frustrated the meandecker; he became belligerent and surly toward the young savant.
Steve began accusing Ian of cheating when there were clearly no reasons for such accusations. He was looking for an out where there was none. It all came to a head during steven’s attack phase, Ian attempted to use an instant during the combat step that steven was unprepared for. In protest of the play, steven began pounding on the table and yelling at the top of his lungs, “YOU ARE CHEAT!! GIRL DRINK HAVE TO HAVE GIVE ME IN MOUTH! SAVAGE ON MY FACE AND LIPS!! YOU ARE THE DEAD IAN!�
He was directing all of his frustration and hostility at the young shortbusser, and everyone was more than a little worried of what might happen next.
Steve could take no more, the game was called off and he ran down stairs. I followed as I thought he might attempt to do something rash. But as I got down the staircase I saw what steve was planning, he was holding josh’s BB gun and the look in his eyes told me that he was only thinking one thing: sweet bloody revenge. Immediately I jumped into action; steve had to be stopped, this was madness. I grabbed a half empty beer bottle that was resting on the stairs for use as a parrying device to deflect the first BB that steve might fire. Then I went after him. Steve was operating purely on impulse at that point. Though he may have had the gun, he saw me coming and knew that I was not going to be phased by the first shot, not with my parrying device in hand anyway. Steve ran behind the entertainment center and then jumped over two couches as he fled.
“NO STAY AWAY!! DON’T BEER ME ON HEAD�
Apparently Steve’s condition makes him deathly afraid of masculine drinks. My parrying device was the menendian kryptonite and he scattered when he saw me coming after him with it. In a flash he darted up the stairs and I was unable to prevent him from getting to the main level where Ian was. But I wasn’t far behind. I drew his attention by waving the beer up above my head still making chase, steve jumped up on the coffee table in an attempt to flee and scoured the area for the shortbusser who had so humiliated him in the draft. Steve found his target and fired his shot.
I remember the rest. It all seemed to play out in slow motion. As steve pulled the trigger, I remember yelling, “Ian, get down!!� I lunged infront of him and took the shot in the shoulder.
What you are seeing in that picture entitled “Late drinking. Let the bodies hit the floor� is the aftermath of PTW protecting his fellow shortbusser from a crazed smmenen.
After the shot was fired, the rest of the shortbussers pinned steve down and wrestled the gun away from him. He had to be closed off in a “time out� from the rest of the party until he recovered from his condition.
That picture entitled “The gauntlet is presented to smmenen� is actually ian and myself having a little talk with steve about letting him out of his “time out�. Steve would only agree to behave if we game him his precious drink.
And that’s the real story behind those pics.
