Dutchies send colouring books to Slovakia

[dandan]

My daughter has received some colouring books and pencils from her Sunday school group (blame my wife, I'm a devout atheist). Some Dutch God-squaddies have bought toys, chocolates, etc and sent them here. Despite the best efforts of my wife to spend all of my money of things we don't need before I get a chance to but cards, I wouldn't classify my daughter as poor, nor are most of the people in the village. I would suggest you Dutchies look up Africa (it's the place you sent the gun-totting Afrikaaners as you didn't want them), I'm pretty sure you'll find more deserving people there.

P.S. Not that I didn't let her keep them
P.P.S. Ditto for the Americans sending missionaries here. Slovakia is about 99% Christian, there's only me to convert!
P.P.P.S. If you do insist on sending stuff over, Slovakia is seriously short of Magic cards

[Moxlotus]

You crazy Europeans and your extra "u"

[Matt]

Were the coloring books of Mohammed?

[Jacob Orlove]

Were the coloring books of Mohammed?

You're confusing the Dutch and the Danish. Here's a simple mnemonic: the Dutch have windmills and tulips, while the Danish are infidel pastries.

[Matt]

Eh, it's all the same when your state is bigger than BeNeLux and Denmark put together!

[Klep]

the Danish are infidel pastries.

It has to be said:

Mmmmm... sacrelicious....

[dandan]

You crazy Europeans and your extra "u"

You are confusing the English language and by implication, England with Europe, something only continentals do (mainly because England is like, in Europe). Europeans have extra Z, V, and CH (at least round here). You Yanks are lacking in letters.

Am I alone in finding it funny that people are saying 'No, no, Islam isn't about violence and terror' by rioting and threatening to kill anyone with a different opinion? Way to go to show people how it is all about peace and love. How can anyone hate the Danes - the people who gave the English language the 'ugh' ending?

[Matt]

I know I say "ugh" whenever I meet a Dane!

[Bram]

Maybe it's high time an actual Dutchie chimed in.

Some Dutch God-squaddies have bought toys, chocolates, etc and sent them here. Despite the best efforts of my wife to spend all of my money of things we don't need before I get a chance to but cards, I wouldn't classify my daughter as poor, nor are most of the people in the village.

What makes you think we were doing this to help out a poor country? Did it ever occur to that we're just trying to unload crap?  We're not the biggest country in the world, and we're kind of taken with its flatness. Due to a freak miscalculation by our country's leading economists, the excess amount of crayons and colouring books was growing so fast that we couldn't simply stow the stuff away in abandoned windmills anymore, so our landscape soon became polluted with artificial mountains of rubbish. Good luck with it (and make sure your daughter doesn't eat the crayons; I'm pretty sure those are part of a plan to illegally export chemical waste).

I would suggest you Dutchies look up Africa (it's the place you sent the gun-totting Afrikaaners as you didn't want them), I'm pretty sure you'll find more deserving people there.

"Thank-you for the colouring book, Mr. Descendant-Of-The-White-Demons-Who-Invented-Slavedriving-And-Sold-My-Ancestors-To-Cotton-Producers. If it isn't too much to ask, I'd like to ask if you could send leprosy medicine next time instead, so that me andmy friends might actually be able to hold the crayons. Kind regard, Ngokoo."

Africa has more pressing problems than a lack of crappy toys.

Eh, it's all the same when your state is bigger than BeNeLux and Denmark put together!

Erm...what? Those countries put together are well over three times larger than your state. That's right, Mr. Texan. The Netherlands, Belgium, Luxemburg and Denmark put together are almost twice as large as the state of alaska and only four times smaller than the whole of the USA, buddy. You see, Denmark also has the Faroe islands and....Greenland! Eskimownt.

[Matt]

Eh, it's all the same when your state is bigger than BeNeLux and Denmark put together!

Erm...what? Those countries put together are well over three times larger than your state. That's right, Mr. Texan. The Netherlands, Belgium, Luxemburg and Denmark put together are almost twice as large as the state of alaska and only four times smaller than the whole of the USA, buddy. You see, Denmark also has the Faroe islands and....Greenland! Eskimownt.

In 1946, the International Traveler's Convention established certain legally binding agreements, acceeded to by all the sovereign nations of the world. Rule #1 is "If it's got no dikes, it can't be Denmark." I might as well claim 1/50th of the Moon for my state, seeing as we're the only ones with a flag there.

APOLLOWNED

P.S. Greenland is a barren land, a land that bears no green, where there's ice and snow, and the whalefishes blow, and the daylight's seldom seen.

[Sylvester]

Matt: Greenland is marketing doublespeak by Erik

[Jacob Orlove]

Rule #1 is "If it's got no dikes, it can't be Denmark."

Because that's the Netherlands?

[Eddie]

In the news: Dutchies and Danes send their stock of world atlases to the US. President Bush orders to send the gifts to the Liberty tower in LA.

[Bram]

Bah! And I didn't even count The Netherlands' South-American and Carribean colonies. But then again, I don't want to

[dandan]

Can't you count Northern Ireland? Some of the people there still march around in orange - clearly Dutchies. William of friggin Orange made that mess. Have it back.

In addition, George 'I see no warming, it's probably just all the napalm, depleted uranium and magnesium we keep dropping' Bush is doing all he can to ensure that Greenland becomes green again (albeit ensuring that Dutchieland becomes blue again).

I saw a report on the news last night that the Dutchies are starting to make floating houses. Can you lot walk on water if you are wearing wooden clogs too?

P.S. Bram, I'm pretty sure they collected money, then bought stuff and sent it. The option of giving it to Africa was there. Perhaps an American advised them to send it to Slovakia in Africa.

P.P.S. Got to love people who don't know Denmark from Holland. Good job the Arabs know which embassy to burn to show how Islam isn't about mindless violence.

Is there anyone I haven't insulted?

[combo_dude]

Is there anyone I haven't insulted?

I very much doubt it. Just indulging that well-known British trait (it used to be primarily America, but we're now the State of "Some Island Really Really Far Away From America, But Still Part Of The USA, Dammit" Formerly Known As England - globalisation at work I think) of trying to piss people off. Usually successfully.

In addition, George 'I see no warming, it's probably just all the napalm, depleted uranium and magnesium we keep dropping' Bush

Possibly one of my favourite lines ever.

[Bram]

I saw a report on the news last night that the Dutchies are starting to make floating houses. Can you lot walk on water if you are wearing wooden clogs too?

We're Dutch, man. We can walk on water barefoot.

Is there anyone I haven't insulted?

You haven't covered handicapped people yet.

[dandan]

I did mention the Dutch

[BigMac]

P.S. Bram, I'm pretty sure they collected money, then bought stuff and sent it. The option of giving it to Africa was there. Perhaps an American advised them to send it to Slovakia in Africa.

As a matter of fact, it is very well possible that the money that was used for them colouring books was collected just after the tsunami in Asia. They collected so much money that they decided to spend it on other projects as well. Slovakia could very much be such a project. But be assured, we Dutches, however mentally or physically challenged we are, are not forgetting Afrika.

And for all of you, believe it or not, we Dutchies actually care about stability in certain regions because of the people, and not because of the economical value of the region. We are still very conscious of all the mistakes we as a country made in the past (although we call the biggest piracy century we ever had still our golden century). Like slavery, it is no coincidence that the most well known dutch word is apartheid.

About us walking over water, we actually have some ways to do that. But the Icelandic have found a way to drive over water with a car, and then i do not mean float over water and drive over land, i mean drive over water and drive over land, as in using only the weels and the speed. It looks kinda like that lizzerd that can walk over water.

[Limbo]

I saw a report on the news last night that the Dutchies are starting to make floating houses. Can you lot walk on water if you are wearing wooden clogs too?

We only need one clog to move about on the water...

[Godder]

Some New Zealand engineer re-designed a sports car to drive across water. I remember seeing it on network news here, and wanting one . The news angle was that it was just the thing for people who lived on Auckland's North Shore who couldn't afford a helicopter, but wanted to avoid the traffic on the Auckland Harbour Bridge.

[Matt]

Rule #1 is "If it's got no dikes, it can't be Denmark."

Because that's the Netherlands?

I did say it's all the same to me.

[Bram]

We only need one clog to move about on the water...

Hahaha, cool, I know where that is. It's very near Amsterdam's Monument on the Dam. I used to walk by it twice every saturday when I was taking my scientific journalism course, which was held in a museum not twenty yards beyond that truck parked in the background (top left). I don't think I ever walked by it when tourists weren't photographing it. Where on earth did you find this picture?

[EDIT] Oh, by the way:



Google Earth is so awesome. I believe, by the way, that Jacob saw this clog also.

[Limbo]

Where on earth did you find this picture?

Not only google earth is amazing, Picture Google is nice as well. Just type floating clog

And yes, I was aiming for a picture of this particular one, as Julie, Lia and me spotted it last year in Amsterdam as well.

[Jacob Orlove]

Oh man, I remember that clog and that plaza. Good times.

[Bram]

You know, it's kind of pathetic really, that we can google up a random picture taken by a foreigner of a random object in The Netherlands, and that not only both the Dutch people in this thread have seen it, but also three (!) non-Dutch TMD members have. Yes, our country is really THAT small.

[Matt]

You know, it's kind of pathetic really, that we can google up a random picture taken by a foreigner of a random object in The Netherlands, and that not only both the Dutch people in this thread have seen it, but also three (!) non-Dutch TMD members have. Yes, our country is really THAT small.

And thus, the final triumph of Matt.

[Bram]

You're just jealous you guys don't have giant clogs.

[dandan]

The Dutchies are giving the Mengusovce nursery school 1000 Euros to buy new furniture. You can buy some serious Power for that sort of money!!

[Bram]

In Slovakia, you can probably buy a seat in the cabinet for that kinda money, and have some REAL power