Contests+Pics+Vids+ an offer you[pete] can't[did] refuse- 9th@Myriad w/Ichorid

Title:

And so-
We reply:
“I know that my life makes you nervous,
but I tell you that I can’t live in service
Like the doctor who was born for a purpose
Rudie. Can’t. Fail.”

-or-

Alternate Title:

WTB: TMD
10,000 CASH
American

time/date/location:
early/sometime in Arpil/somewhere in NE

I arise, born again to ride from the North. Hungover, red-eyed and bleery, I have only just escaped the madness that envelopes my fridged wasteland of a home (Maine – Snow in April, I hate you). This morning I am no Johnny Magic. I am not even Brassman. Nay, no – I may even be still drunk. McDonalds + some kind of meat/onion/bagel concoction + a quick nap in the parking lot + coffee = goodness. They forgot my hashbrowns. Fuckers.

Sometime later I am back on the road.
I find more coffee at Irving before I hit the pike.
I feel much better.

I had vowed yet again not to play Ichorid. This time I meant it. To the shelf with thee, at least until Future Sight came out (btw: Future Sight Ichorid may be something to test..yah’know- if you like wining and whatnot)

-I lied to myself. Sometime around 2 am, digging in a commons box for land grants and ESG’s, wanting to go back to the fun, I realize that I’m going to break my promise yet again. Like so many times before, I fold into the soft comfort of black horrors and nightmare shadows. So good.

My List-y

Name: Attack of the Black-Zombie-Jesus
“Happy Easter Everyone!”

// Lands
3 Petrified Field
4 Bazaar of Baghdad
3 Mishra's Factory
1 Strip Mine
2 City of Brass

// Creatures
4 Golgari Grave-Troll
4 Myr Reteriver
4 Nether Shadow
4 Ichorid
2 Sutured Ghoul
4 Stinkweed Imp
1 Sundering Titan
4 Shambling Shell

// Spells
4 Chalice of the Void
4 Serum Powder
4 Cabal Therapy
2 Dragon Breath
2 Dread Return
4 Unmask

// Sideboard
SB: 1 City of Brass
SB: 1 Ancestor's Chosen (fish, combo, apparently Mono-green WTF)
SB: 3 Children of Korlios (combo)
SB: 3 Ancient Grudge (needles, crypts, stax)
SB: 3 Phantasmagorian (tested instead of PIMP)
SB: 4 Gemstone Mine

*mini-contest #1*
In the past, why have I run PIMP (bonus points if you can tell me what I’m refering too) in the Ichorid board?

Derpa, Derpa, If you can’t see the reasons behind the list by now, I suggest a search of my other reports. That being said, I was curious to see how Phanta would hold up against needle in the matches that I didn’t want to bring mana in. As you can see, I again ran the “Leyline” gambit. Simply put, Leyline is crap…against anything that isn’t Ichorid. Seriously, why else run it, and then, you better be running 4. Oh, and I might just beat down with bad fish creatures anyways. That being said, Extirpate is still a pain, and I did expect that. Hence lots of different animate targets. This mattered in more then a few games (see below for more details), and I’m happy to say that this list has finally proven itself in a tournament setting against the blasted card. Big woots.

45ish players, nice field. TPS was missing, but Brassy, Eld, Oli, Ray, Travis, blah blah All-the-rest-of-NewEngland blah blah blah was there.

Speaking of BigJuggs….

*mini-contest #2*
What could he be doing here?
linky-linky

right, right, on to the rounds and what not. Again, standard disclaimer. This here old guy (me) has seen many winters pass (24 baby). Combo of no notes, and a terrible memory serve to leave us all with a possibly less then factual report. I promise to do my best, but I would be appreciative of any match opponents chime'mn in if they see something amiss.

Round 1: Mono Green Beats c/o JankGolem
Game1: So yea, we shuffle up and set to play. I proceeded to lose the die roll, mull to 6 and say “go ahead”. Jank lays a rootmaze, passes the turn. Oh yea…did I mention…he lays the rootmaze with a basic forest…lol, so good. I lay a tapped bazaar, pass the turn. He does something that’s not a wasteland, and I smile since I have the second Bazaar in hand. Fast forward 2 turns and I have the win on the table. Jank is tapped out with a TARAPAN in play. Oh man, this match is the best. I think about what Mono-green could do tapped out (I am fairly low on life), and decide to chance the ESG -> Fog. Good choice, he’s got nothing, on to game 2.

In: Gemstone Mines and Grudges. Out:: a combonation of Unmasks and a Myr and a Shambling Shell.

Game 2: Turn 1 he lays 2x crypt. Frown town. I think I may be able to beat it, but am quickly overwhelmed by a rootmaze (I think) and a wasteland in the coming turns. Ouch. I play it out to see what kind of deck he is running. I am beaten down by Elves, Vipers, and Trolls with Keen Sense.

Game 3: Yay, I get to start. I manage a mull to some low number (Jank says 5), and do the whole cycle cards on turn 1. Jank hits a waste, which is frown town considering I can’t find good dredgers. I try for draw step dredges, but am overwhelmed again by crypt and wasteland.

Matches: 0-1
Games: 1-2

I’ll end with a comment I posted in his excellent report:

“Heh, and so goes our match. Something like 5 crypts played in our last two games. That being said, I'm pretty sure that I could have beaten the crypts since your clocks were slow. What killed me were the green-curiosity equiped creatures that drew you into wasteland, rootmaze (which cut off my hasted outs), and more crypts that nailed the coffin shut.

Nice tec w/ Keen Sense in a green fishy deck. Forget about what people say about fish and standstill. Curiosity was the draw engine, and it was a beast when you weren't prepared.”

Man oh man, Gee Gee on running Mono-Green Aggro to 12th. Shine on your crazy diamond, shine on.

*mini-contest #3*
It deserves to be noted; at sometime during my final game I look over to a certain Barnsworth at my right and see this redic stack. It’s the final turn before time is called. See if you can count the counters in the pic!

Round 2: Oath c/o (sorry, forgot your name)
Game 1: I do what Ichorid tends to do, and win game 1. Nice guy, apparently used to play Salvagers Oath.

Game 2: I lose to an early Oath. Sad face, but I couldn’t get a Bazaar to stick. Things progressed slowly enough that I couldn’t keep his tokens off the table with Cabal and Dread. I was still kinda mentally groggy from the night before, and I managed to miss 7 damage on the table between not attacking with tokens and nether shadows. Angels finish me off in short order when I fail to dredge my out (well, as much as a lethal Sutured Ghoul is considered an out).

Game 3: I get an early Bazaar, followed quickly by a chalice at 0. He FOW’s. I again, chalice of 0. He pauses, and then FOW’s again. Combined with a mulligan, he’s too far down on cards to matter. He does get a pithing needle, but it’s quickly grudged away.

Oiy, vey. I’m actually pretty happy most times to see Oath across the table. People should realize this by now, but Oath tends to be a pretty good match up in the general sense considering that Ichorid has a similar clock, and can use the Orchard tokens for Therp and Returns.

Matches 1-1
Games 3-3

Round 3: TMWA c/o (again, nameless)
Game 1: Yay yay, go Ichorid. I get the 7 card Bazaar hand against someone who is not familiar with the deck. GG goes game one at a right quick pace. I’m worried however about Game 2. I know TMWA has a significant amount of hate to be had, and it can be a tough fight if I don’t manage a good draw.

In: Phanta, Gemstones, and 2 Grudges Out: Unmasks, Shambling Shell, and 1 Myr.

Game 2: Wawawa-no early crypt, although there is a Lavamancer down first turn. Future turns sees the playing of discard and beats. Sometime around turn 4 I’m down to the wire with very few creatures left in my deck. It hasn’t helped that I started the game by Mulling 3 7 card serum powder hands (that’s 21 cards RGF’d for those additionaly challenged). Between his lavamancer and his EE set for 2 (against neither shadow), I’m desperately working the stats on getting my last manlands in play, while still dredgeing enough to keep the pressure on. It’s tense, but I count correctly, and my last card in the deck is a Mishra’s Factory which I choose to draw. This gives me exactly enough creatures to Dread Return a lethal ghoul even in the face of EE and Lavamancer.

Matches: 2-1
Games: 5-3

Round 4: U/W fish c/o ?
Game 1: The poor man mulls to 4. He comments on how he wishes he was playing Ichorid (I think it’s a trap), but no, he really is playing something else. He opens with a lion and I quickly surmize UW Fishies. Mull to four against Ichoird with a good draw is disaster. I wrap it up quickly and move to game 2.

Game 2: I was so close. Really close. He let slip that he doesn’t have Ichorid hate this match, I don’t belive him and SB in some number of grudges and manas. Silly me, he wasn’t kidding. I walk on to win this one in an easy….

No…

That’s not what happened.

Actually he manages to play out 3 (I think) E-truths, and at least 2 Orims Chants. So good. He stalls me long enough that I don’t have enough cards in my library to return my bounced creatures. So close, and yet so far. I die to self decking.

Game 3: He mulls to oblivion, I don’t. I get a really good draw. I have the kill on board in turn 3 of extra turns, but I miss the DragonBreath in the yard (again!?). It’s okay because I’ve already striped his hand and I win anyways on turn 5.

Matches: 3-1
Games: 7-4

Well, I think this round exposes something not really covered in my match-up analysis before. Orims and combined with timely E-truths can be a huge pain. Since you only have two creature types, and you have to pass priority to get from your upkeep -> your first main phase, it’s fairly easy to bounce enough creatures to slow you down for a turn. Tack on the fact that in later rounds, it may be hard to get those creatures back into the graveyard because of a low deck size, and I’d consider it a fairly exploitable weakness. Also of note was the Orims Chant. It’s never something that I wanted to Cabal early, but the fact that it’s basically a timewalk against me is nothing to sneeze at.

Again, no picture (that I can find on my phone at least). Instead we’re gonna play the I-Tunes game.

-shuffle-
Rascal Flats – Praying for Daylight
Nas – My Way
Nas – Warrior Song
(wow, shuffle sucks on apple products)
Led Zeppelin – Black Mountain Side
Beatles – Come Together
Old Crow Medicine Show - Silver Dagger
Greatful Dead – Knocking on Heavens Door
Wyclef – Perfect Gentalmen

Coulda been worse, coulda been better. I <3 Nas (+1), but two in a row is lame on shuffle (-1 point). Rascal Flats is so 2000 (-1 point). Little known Zep was a nice breather (+1 point) but gets mad bonus stats when combined with Beatles covers (+4). OCM always gets a flat +2, with additional modifiers depending on the song. Dagger fit my mood (+3 total). Dead is good, but seriously, I wasn’t in the mood for a billion min song (-2). Wyclef gives a nice upbeat ending (+1).

Total Score: 6 points

*mini-contest #4*
How many points would Sublimes “Don’t Push” net if followed directly by Nappy Roots “Po Folk”?

Round 5: Drain Tendrils c/o Glix
Mad Cheats, I’m gonna pull from Glix’s report.
[this is me talking]

“Round 5 (nataz w/ ICHOROID)[he means to say BLACK-ZOMBIE-JESUS]
I had watched two of his games so far, so I knew exactly what he was playing [Sigh, there is a downside to dredgeing your entire deck]. Ichorid, without breath (or might as well have been because he didn’t see the god damned card in his yard [hey-it looks like ancient grudge], which gave him instant wins in both matches I saw for some reason, although he still one both through completely unnecessary shenanigans)[lies! – or, maybe not].

Game 1: His game goes perfect, unmasking my shit and ripping my hand to shreds while smashing my face in.[rawr! - binary]

Boarding: IN: 2 Crypt [big frowns], 2 Tinker/Bigman[haha-who wins with that anymore], Darkblast[copy cat]; OUT: FoF, 1 Rebuild [how will you beat chalice!], 2 Drains

Game 2: Turn one crypt[ouch]. Draw some cards. Drain ancient grudge[wtf, who leaves in drains against Ichorid – meh, if not for the counter this game was mine…MINE I TELL YOU]. Win with something eventually (tendrils by the look of it)[yeppers, tendrils for a lot].

Game 3: He drops some early disruption, but has NO DREDGERS for the first like 4 turns. It was depressing [remember, when dredgeing always cut lengthwise] . Because of this, he gets a really slow start [I’ve seen glaciers move faster], and in the meantime I tinker up the big buy and generate around 12 gobos to go with him. He concedes [while howling in a bitter Rage!].”

Matches: 3-2
Games: 8-5

Round 6: Scroll Aggro c/o Andy

Bummer. The loss to Glix means that it’s do or die time. Me and Andy run the numbers and figure that with our tiebreakers the winner of our match may sneak into the top 8 if Travis can beat Glix in his rd. 6 match (Travis had snagged a Draw and a Loss earlier). So, we decide to play it out.

Game 1: Ichorid does it’s thing. Yes, I know its boring to hear that, but really, that’s what it does. No interesting decisions, no tight plays. With a Bazaar and Chalice, this game is over in the first 3 turns. Quick enough in fact that I forgot he wasn’t playing Gifts, and almost mis-sideboard. Don’t worry, I(Andy) catch my mistake (Thanks Andy!).

In: Phanta
Out: Unmask

Game 2: Andy wreaks face after I have a slow start. I lose my Bazaar at some point in time and vainly try and build up to 7 cards while I am beaten down by confidants. Hillariously, there was a moment where Andy could have lost to multiple confidant triggers, but by then I just didn’t care. He had draw a million cards, and was discarding every turn. He tried to hide the fact that he had sided in Extirpate and Grunt, but I already knew.

Game 3: See, me and Andy have a pattern. I win game 1 like I’m supposed to. Game 2, randomness strikes, and I’m never really in it. Game 3 however; all mine. I own it. It doesn’t matter what Andy sides in, or what he draws, game 3 historically has belonged to me. By turn 2 I have poised to bring back next turn a combonation of neither shadows, Ichorids, and myr. I have a Dread Return in the library, as well as a factory on the board. I have multiple Cabal Therepys in the yard. Andy’s lone Extirpate and STP can’t stop the signal. GG.

Matches: 4-2
Games: 10-6

I just can't ~~quit~~ beat you

Sigh, its all fairly anti-climatic because Travis (wat a noob) lost to Glix (Damn You Glix!), so it’s a moot win. So close and yet so far. I am dual foiled (and not in the good way) by the nefarious Glix. Still, there is fun to be had. I manage a 3th place finish in the free(!) Tumbling Dice event which nets me a pack of Planar Chaos.

*mini-contest #5*
What place did Travis finish in Tumbling Dice?

This of course leads into a TTP draft, in which I manage to wear large clown shoes FTL. Post draft brings to light this insightful video.

“Is this going on YouTube?”

But yea, the top 8 plays out like this:

Ray v. Eld

Oli v. (~~Don’t know your name, sorry~~ Dan C!)

Mike v. Kyle

Glix v. Billy (oh Billy)

Top 4 sees Eric, ~~Mike~~ ~~marc~~ ~~mark~~ kyle!, Glix and Oli -> a Top 2 split of Oli and Glix

*mini-contest #6*
TMD names for all of the top 8 (bonus points if you can I.D. the unknown player)

Gotta say, even though 9th is frustrating, I still had a good time. A great part of that comes from the free side events that Dan runs. Tumbling Dice is fun, and I know a lot of people enjoy the vintage draft.

Answers to mini-contests!

#1: Beat on Pithing Needle

#2:ZOMG-

Yes, Travis did try and buy TMD.

So what is TMD worth folks? I guess we shall never know. Pete has turned down the offer. Strike one out for seeing BIG TITTIES again on TMD.

(p.s. unban Travis)

#3: 7! I bet you missed the FOW in the graveyard.

#4
5 points

#5
4th

#6
Ray(iamfishman) v. Eric(eld)
Oli(englishman in NH) v. (Don’t know your name, sorry!)
Mike (f*-forgot his TMD name) v. Kyle (whateverworks)
Glix(ah, glix) v. Billy (abdullahthebutcher)

herbertj2000: hey, you want to be quoted in my report? say something witty
cross: oh hold on i think i have something from our website
herbertj2000: bonus for making fun of steve/meandeck
cross: jotun grunt can beat it, but if you play that you probably swallow semen anyways, (not that its not completely delicious)
cross: or
cross: well everyone on tmd is basically stupid.

More pics, just for fun.

The New Paragons of Vintage: Ray, Andy, Travis

For some reason, Oli likes to show me his tongue. It’s kinda creepy. Maybe this is some kind of strange Britanion greeting I’m unaware of.

Last off, I want to give up props to Dan. Last month I lost a tight race to Dave for best report (grumble grumble). Dan however more then made up for the loss by handing out some second place prizes. In the end I chose a Chinese Stripper and a Foil Ghost quarter. Sure, they aren’t a dual land, but they are pretty, and I got to pick what I wanted out of his binder.

So yea, I vote that everyone vote for this report. Who doesn’t love pictures?

Sorry for the kinda crappy report
Truthfully, my heads not in this
Hearts out to those in and out of my circle at VT