TOURNAMENT REPORT: 3rd place with Parfait

[Anonymous]

All right folk welcome to another edition of Bill goes to tournaments to play test new ideas!

The tournament was held at the Green Dragon in Charleston SC and was unfortunately not as well advertised as it could have been.  

Pros: only 15 people showed up so half the field auto top 8's!

Cons: only the hardcore players showed up. No real timmy's and scrubs.

This Tournament was also a proxy tourney

Pros: you can run whatever sick deck you have ever wanted to!

Cons: everyone else will be running what ever sick decks they want to...

So like an elemetary school in Oakland, everyone was packing heat.

This is the pile of jank I brought to test and try out.  Sideboard was thrown together.  In honor of K-Run I will not refer to this as parfait.  Its more like trailer park (TP for short, toilet paper?)

TP (trailer park)

4 Land Tax
3 Scroll Rack
2 Claws of Gix
4 Ivory Tower
2 Humility
1 Abyss
4 Swords to Plowshares
1 Blood Moon
3 Seal of Cleansing
1 Tormod's Crypt
1 Ivory Mask
1 Balance
4 Argivian Find
2 Replenish
1 Enlightened Tutor
2 Sacred Mesa
1 Empyrial Armor
1 Sol Ring
1 Mox Pearl
1 Mox Jet
1 Mox Ruby
1 Mox Diamond
1 Lotus Petal
1 Black Lotus
1 Swamp
1 Mountain
14 Plains

SB
4 Wasteland
1 Stripmine
4 Orim's Chant
1 Bloodmoon
2 Tormod's Crypt
2 Replenish
1 Seal of cleansing

Yeah, yeah I know... how did he even make it with this pile.
5 rounds of swiss, cut to top 8.

Round One

FIGHT!

First round I am paired with Matt Powers. Former monoblack land D player, former suicide black player, but in a proxy tourney anything can happen.

Game 1
I keep an interesting hand, humility and some swords, a tower and some lands.  I go first and start dropping stuff trying to get the humility out quick.  I start seeing a lot of blue making non basic lands and a bunch of artifact mana.  Great first match up is against keeper.  I drop out the tower and the humility, but I have like one card in hand.  Too late! I see him drop a sapphire medallion...  TRIX!!! I was not expecting this from him and the first one comes out and he donates it.  I try to pay the upkeep but I don't make it in time to gain life from the tower.  

to the bat cave!

I watch him carefully.  He just starts shuffling up to play again.  Cocky bastard! (not really Matt is a funny guy).  He boards nothing, so now I know he is not going transformational and grabbing any morphs so all the crowd control goes out for wastes/strip and the replenishes and seals.  

Game 2

My opening hand is awesome.  The game is a wonderous blur of multiple towers, multiple seals, and his own mana crypt hitting him!  My life buffer is so high two illusions couldn't kill me.  God I hate TRIX.  

Again he does not board.  

Game 3

He stays on what he guesses is a second turn kill.  Wastelanding his only land out gives me time to tax, tower, seal....  I was taxing and racking and tutoring.  I had 3 towers out against him and I was gaining 9 life a turn with 2 seals on the ground.  

Victory is sweet!

1-0

Round 2

FIGHT!

This does not look pretty, I am facing Demonic Attorney playing enchantress.  I have like no experience playing parfait vs. enchantress.  He is scared of aura of silence and blood moon.  Since there are so few people, we figure we will ID and take our seperate pathes.

Intentional draw

1-0-1

(as a sidenote Chris and I played a few games and I probably would have won if we had played for real.  Bloodmoon just owns him.  But Chris is cool as hell and we were talking about so mods to the deck.)

Round 3

Peter out...

I get paired with Michael "piss and moan" Beachner.  Mike is a really good player.  Really good.  Mike likes to bitch constantly if he is loosing.  Unfortunately for me this time I did not get to hear him bitching.  He was playing a RecSur build which parfait should own.

Game 1

I get a decent opening that doesn't go anywhere.  Tower is not active and his humiliated creatures just came running too quick.  

to the boards!

Game 2

This was even worse and I don't even want to talk about it...
I all I remeber was naturalizes and he had 3 survivals in his opening hand.  

Oh well karma is a bitch....

1-1-1

Round 4

SMASH!!!!

I am now paired against one of my little padawans.  Matt "matty" Hatch.  He is running reanimator with contamination and zombie infestation.  He has the squees and horrors to back it up.  Matt and I alway talk deck construction and advice during matches.  Matt is a great, great guy and a proxy tourney let him run all the power he does not have.  

Game one

Seals wait for his infestations.  Humility, abyss, crypting the gaveyard, argivian finding the crypt.  Matt scoops and goes to the board.

Game 2

Matty brings the noise.  Duresses and kegs are hitting fast, I drop the abyss and humilty and towers.   I get out the mesa.  I eat the abyss with my claws of gix. Towers have been gaining me sick life.  I decide to go for disgusting.  While the ponies and the zombies are playing tag (he has 4 sqees and some krovikan horros in hand) I eventually manage to get out all 4 towers!!!!  I am not gaining 12 life a turn.  We are getting close the time limit (damn why did I board out the empyrial armor!).  Matt hits me hard with haunting echoes so I have no more recursion and no more seals.  Keg comes out and eats my towers.  I am at 90 life when he does it.  I am now at the point where I am having to rack my hand down and draw to avoid milling my self.  I keep making ponies, he can make like 4 zombies a turn, I start pumping ponies like a lonely farmer.   If matt loses this match he has no hope for the finals, he wants to take me down with him.  I finally amass the pony army any pound him down just before the time limit.

2-1-1

Round 5

Punk out!

Mike "stally" Mazujiajn one of the local navy nuke school pukes is playing oath.   I should have played him.  I was garenteed first game and after board I would probably have smashed him.  But if we ID we are garenteed in because we are in the top half of the curve.  I am a punk and we ID.

2-1-2

only in a tourney with 15 players can you go 2-1-2 and make top 8!

On to the Finals (you all can watch from the timmy table!)


TOP 8

First round is Stevie Kaufmann running Red/Green Beats.  Basically R/G zoo. Very fast, very bad juju!  This deck is tailored to beat keeper.  I am fortunately not playing keeper...

Game one

I get out all the juicy goodness on him.  Abyss clears the way, except that stubborn nimble mongoose.  Humilty joins the crowd with some towers and after he is cleared of critters I sit back a little and juice up on some life.  Mesa starts swinging and he dies while I am at 45 life.

he hits the board hard... I see lots of stuff coming in.  I know this build and he has 3 hull breaches and 4 naturalizes in the board.  Thats ok I have 2 more replenishes!

Game 2 is just really bad for him.  Lotus and argivian find drop out 2 humilities and enlightened tutor finds the abyss.  Towers come out with the taxes.  He starts naturalizing and hull breaching.  I argivian find stuff here, and there.  He kills some more.  I replenish...  He is getting flustered.  I show him finds and replenishs in my hand. He scoops after the ponies hit the ground.

TOP 4

I get paired against my hetero-lifemate Cullen "loves da" Cox.  Cullen is running paragon keeper.  Cullen plays parfait when he is not running proxies.  Cullen has wet dreams about playing keeper and he plays it very well.  We would go on to make 1st place and as I write this he is probably at home right now giving it to his girlfriend making her call him Brian Weissman while he gives it to her in her Kai Budde!

Game one

I play keeper against Cullen all the time and it is one of his hardest match ups.  I run haunting echoes either main or in the side.  He ran it in the side.  He know how bad it is against parfait.  Too make a long story short Cullen gorrila butt smashes me.  And I get to watch the finals from the timmy table...

Round to decide whether I get 3rd or 4th place!

Dave Allen is one of my favorite people in the world to play magic with.  He has a lot of 1st places and top 8's under his belt and he is chucktowns boy to send over to savannah to take their tournament prizes from them.

Dave is playing Paragon Keeper with the power aftifact combo.  

Game one

I stay on a really iffy hand because all this round means is do I will 20 bucks or 30 bucks.  I drop a petal and a land.  He goes keeper juicy goodness, ancestral, walk, mox galore.  I drop another land.  I try to drop pit blood moon knowing it will be countered, but balls to the wall!  he fact or fictions, he cunning wishes.  I go to but the bloodmoon in the graveyard.  He's like, no it's there...  I'm like, no, its ok, dats cool.  He's like no really I have no bannannas!!!  moon hits the board!   Oh crap I better work fast.  but I'm playing parfait how can I work fast.  With lotus I drop out the mesa with two open.  I make a pony.  on my upkeep I make another pony.  Then I don't pay the upkeep on mesa and start to resolve my land tax.  People who cannot see my hand are more than a little stunned?   Yeah that's right Bill don't try to win!  Oh no... I draw a land and drop the empyrial armor I had in hand since the begining on the elder of my ponies and swing for 8.  Next turn its big tax, swing for 11 and baby pony makes 20!
Armor for the win!!!!!

Hit the board like the fat kid in dodgeball!
-Seals, STPS, towers,  and the Abyss
+wastes/strip, chants, replenishes, bloodmoon

I board 12 cards against him

Game 2

A timid opening of land and lotus petal.  I then try to drop the blood moon with two plains and the petal 2nd turn.  he counters as I knew he would.  I argivian find the lotus petal.  Then the blood moon. I try again later.  and it goes through.  and he scoops.

All in all this was one of the most fun tourney I have played ever!!

PROPS

both the Matts.  

Dave for having proxy tourney, which are a blast to play.

Mike M you sexy nuke puke for beating down with a scapalexis or whatever that type 2 janky beast was.

Cullen gets UBER props for going all the way!!!

And everyone else gets major props for being very positive and up beat.  No one was bitching when they lost or complaining about their match ups.  All the comments were "oh no, not again..." with a big smile.  Or "damn man I thought I had you, great recovery" with a big hand shake.  "Or who am I? are you my daddy?" oh wait, no one said that, sorry.

SLOPS

Michael Beachner for being the only really negative player in a room full of people having a good time.  And for bitching about people running net decks.  Cards only help so much, its player skill.  We all know what happens if Chub Toad gets his hands on a well tuned deck... And we all remeber how long cullen was terrorizing people with that janky creation old Number 7.  

Secondary Props

Michael Beachner for always being a very creative deck builder and a damn good player. (have more fun next time!)

Thanks everybody, whimpy turn out, strong players, good fun.
 
Evil Bill

PS every one post their decklists so they will all officially be net decks!

[MoreFling]

Hey, nice report, I enjoyed reading it  

I was wondering about one thing though, decklist related:

Since you're all up with the towers, why not try Test of Endurance in place of Emperial Armor.

Test of Endurance (JUD-R), color: W, cost: {2WW}, Enchantment; At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 50 or more life, you win the game. ["If we have learned nothing else, we have learned to survive." -Mystic elder (Judgment)]

I know it's probably just a fun deck, but this baby would hurt  

[Jebus]

Everyone (and I really do mean just about everyone) was suggesting he slip Test of Endurance in there but, it he refuses to do it.

When you think about it, it is sort of a silly win condition and Bill doesn't seem like the kind of guy to take that route.

-Billy

[Anonymous]

As silly as the deck may look, I refuse to go alternate win.  I will beat you down my little pony style.

Morefling:  you know surprisingly the deck did really, really well.  Try one day putting in 4 towers over your 4 orim's chants.  I never missed the chants.  

I was thinking before about using library of leng as a defense against discard.  Then I realized that the synery with the tax/tower would be ungodly!.  

1st turn land/tower

2nd turn gain 1 life (21) drop land tax.

3rd turn tax/tower gain 4 life (25) drop library.

4rd turn tax/tower gain 6 life (31)

5th turn tax/tower gain 9 life (40)

and if you get out a second tower at some point...

well 2 towers out with 15 cards in hand (which tax makes ver easy) is 22 life a turn.  3 turns later assuming you are not taxing anymore that's 66 life for no mana!

with little one drops you can make yourself imortal to all critter damage and burn becomes a bad, bad joke.  

seals or aura would take care of strange combo kill.  Discard is obsolete against you with library out.  Ivory mask you need against tormod's crypt and combo kill strategys.  Also scroll rack with 15 or so cards in hand is really, good.  And with the library out you don't have to discard anything.

K-Run's original theory for the deck was basically annoy the hell out of people form what I understand.  Then parfait evolved into the white strategy nuetering monster that it is today.  In honor of parfait I will not reffer to my deck as parfait as it will also avoid flames and other trouble.  I jokingly called the deck trailer park in honor of my posting name, but with the new evolution of adding the library I am calling it TRUCK STOP since it stops fast aggro dead.  Also the empyrial armor with lots of cards can be a one shot swing.  That's when you send over your mack truck to their face.

here is the first working evolution.  Any suggestions and comments would be greatly appreciated.  Please do not post things that modify this into parfait.  It is NOT parfait.

TRUCK STOP (beta version)

Da Big Block Engine (9)

4 Land Tax
3 Scroll Rack
2 Claws of Gix

Crowd Control (7)

2 Humility
4 Swords to Plowshares
1 Balance

Lifegain Engine (7)

4 Ivory Tower
3 Libray of Leng

Recycle (6)

4 Argivian Find
2 Replenish

Tools (4)

1 Tormod's Crypt
3 Seal Of Cleansing

White's one tutor

1 Enlightened Tutor

My Little Ponies (3)

2 Sacred Mesa
1 Empyrial Armor

Mana (23)

1 Solring
1 Lotus Petal
1 Mox Pearl
1 Mox Diamond
1 Black Lotus
1 Strip Mine
4 Wasteland
13 Plains

SB
4 Orim's Chant
2 Replenish
2 Bloodmoon
1 Mountain
2 Tormod's Crypt
2 Ivory Mask
1 Sacred Mesa
1 Empyrial Armor
1 Seal Of cleansing

Well there it is the first version.  I had to put the bloodmoon in the sideboard.  I never really used it except against keeper.  

anyway thanks for reading this monster.  If you have the extra cards build it and try it out.

[Zelif]

Quote (Jebus @ Feb. 02 2003,12:38)Everyone (and I really do mean just about everyone) was suggesting he slip Test of Endurance in there but, it he refuses to do it.
-Billy

Maybe Golden Wish, for those games where you lose your original win conditions, and need one (or an extra/alternative)?

SB: 2 Blood Moon
2 Orim's Chants
Divine Intervention
Shaharazad
Sacred Mesa
Test of Endurance
etc.
etc.


Darren A. Dew
THE UNION

[Anonymous]

I'm not quite sold on the wish, but it is a good idea.

I actually thought about just making this more aggro.  Using the towers and library to build a huge hand.  Lifegain to ignore your opponent.  Humility to stop their critters.  Up the mesa and armor count to 3/2 respectively and just pound through with big bird!  

We missed you at the tourney Darren!

[Anonymous]

Congratulations Cullen.  You always play with class.
For those interested in my early demise, here it goes.

I played urphidian, which I don't think I'll play next time because its boring for me and moreso for my opponent.

Round 1 vs. Jon Spires (an aspiring rules lawyer and a founding member of Charleston faggotry) and his combo I won't dare to name.
As I recall he took game 1 and I took #2 with a 'God'  hand - land, mox, mox. mox, efreet (fow, mana leak in hand) We draw game 3 because neither could win

round 2 vs. Matt Hatch playing reanimator
I swept.  Matt is really cool to play against and I hope he keeps coming.

round 3 vs. Demonic Attorney playing enchantress.
Chris hasn't played in a tournament in a while so it was good to have him with us.  A charter member of team emphysema, I thought if I countered one more spell, he too would have crapped his pants.  I swept 2-0-1

round 4 vs Dave (carbon) Allen playing paragon keeper
Dave is the rules lawyer and the original founder of Charleston faggotry.
He offers to ID, which I accept because I thought he was cool (until he couldn't find anything for his shivan reefs).  We play a few which I usually win because of maindeck bloodmoons.
Anyway, on to round 5 2-0-2

round 5 vs Mike B playing recsur
He kindly accepts an ID and we move to the ROUND O' 8

r o 8 vs Cullen Cox playing keeper
He slaughtered me, plain and simple.  In addition I played like a chip toothed crack whore.

Slops
1.  To those that didn't show up
2.  For Mike getting pissed off
3. Me, for playing like an old pair of crappy pants
4. The blo-me homey for selling out Shawn and the Mexihomey
Props
1. For Mike getting pissed off, few things make me laugh harder than when gets mad.  (poor Stally)
2. Dave, for running the tournament
3. Cullen, for teaching me a lesson
4. To those that showed up

[Zelif]

Quote (Guest @ Feb. 03 2003,00:24)I'm not quite sold on the wish, but it is a good idea.

I actually thought about just making this more aggro.  Using the towers and library to build a huge hand.  Lifegain to ignore your opponent.  Humility to stop their critters.  Up the mesa and armor count to 3/2 respectively and just pound through with big bird!  

We missed you at the tourney Darren!

Missed you, too, you big luvable beast.
I wuz kinda kidding about the Wish thing, as no one seems to think anything of the Death and Golden Wish, and I'm working on Death, and want someone to make Golden ones viable.

Neat Armor trick.


Darren A. Dew
THE UNION

[Zelif]

Wow, if Beech got that pissed, maybe I shoulda been there.  

Sorry about the double post....

Darren A. Dew
THE UNION

[Anonymous]

Yeah the armor was just thrown in as a card to test out.  But it saved my ass against Dave.  He had moxen on the table and could have easily gotten rid of the bloodmoon in time.  The armor let me smash through really quick.

I'm gonna try to make an empryrial armor/tax/tower/library deck.  scroll rack with 15 cards in hand is just sick.  

Anyway I will be playtesting the deck with the libray's added somehow.  and I think if it works I will go to 3 mesa and 2 armor.  Who knows.  Grow-a-Pony!

[Anonymous]

I'm really intrested in the fact you run The Abyss WT. I was wondering, doesn't it cost you two ponies at upkeep? If the rules don't work that way, I'm definitely going to give it a try in my parfait.

[Jebus]

You'll need to use a pony that was already in play before your upkeep, but you can stack it so you only loose one.

The Abyss ability targets when it goes on the stack at the beginning of your upkeep.  If you stack that first, then the upkeep for your Sacred Mesa, the Mesa resolves first.  You sac the targeted pony and when The Abyss resolves, the target is no longer there, countering the ability on resolution.

[Anonymous]

Ok, and if I have sacred out from last turn, no ponies yet, I can stack the mesa, then abyss. Abyss resolves first, nothing to target, then I can create a token, sack to mesa, thus keeping it alive. Correct?

[Jebus]

That works too.

[Anonymous]

Abyss was my reuseable wrath of god.

When I got out the mesa, I usually just ate the abyss with claws of gix.  

but if mesa and claws are both out you have some options.

resolve abyss with no critters.

go on to mesa, make a pony, feed mesa.

the other way is make a pony on your opponents turn.
upkeep.
abyss targets pony you made last turn.
Resolve mesa, feed that pony to mesa.
Resolve abyss, its target is no longer there.

I loved the abyss.  It really helped out.  Espeacially with humility out.  Then it eats up morphs and other untargetables.

Black also brings other side board possibilities.

Megrim-would be great against grow-a-tog, madness, and cycling.  Some of this type 2 goofiness will eventually come over to type 1

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the rulings Jebus. And while im not sure if you first thought up the idea, thanks WhiteTrash for the thought of putting in The Abyss. I have a University Tourny tonight, and have had trouble against aggro. Going to go do some testing. Oh, and great report, def gives me some ideas.

[Anonymous]

thanks Hatel.  try it out and let me know what you think.  The towers were awesome.
And the abyss fits the deck better than the wrath of god in my opinion since it is an enchantment, in a deck that recurrs enchantments.