Apocalyptic Visions from the Edge of Hell

[Ric_Flair]

The guys on The Source, or at least most of them, really seem to be jazzed about the changes.  A few folks, have not taken the new format too well.  Some of the quotes are just too hilarious not to make fun of, so below are a list of the best of the best.  Names have been left out to protect the innocent (crybabies).

I just shit my pants and my eyes burned out of my skull I just bought Drains.

My response: hahahahahahahhaha! Sucker.  No seriously, you realize that Drains were worth $100+ a piece because of T1 right?  Not T 1.5.  OK, so you can just sell them to us.

I dont even care about the double post the world is fucking ending the renaming 1.5.

Nuclear bombs, terrorism, biological weapons all hide in shame.  The world's end is caused rules changes in a format played by 150 people.  Seriously, if this is the end of the world for you, you should probably move up to something more thrilling...like masturbation.

STFU, your a fucking idiot, you can't spell and can't even seem to comptenplate the fact that 1.5 is as good as DEAD. Without an influx of new players coming immediately they just destroyed so much work with one stroke, I wouldn't be suprised if everyone good quit and played T1 or 1.x.

You mean people haven't already quit and started playing Vintage and 1.x?

The format's balls just got ripped off.

Yip.

GG 1.5.
Good fucking game.

This is a sentence in which "fucking" is functioning as an adjective.  

It's official the best card in the whole format is Force of Will.

What changed?

Can I have the address of DCI headquarters?  I think we all need to take a roadtrip to rape and pillage the DCI. TWICE

I remember reading a criminal threatening statute a few days ago...

The format is dead now.  It's not T1.5 anymore.  It's like another extended.  Who thought of this.  How do we contact them.  I will fight this untill the bitter end.  I don't want to be one of those people who complains about everything that "ruins" the format, but this has actually killed it.  T1.5 was supposed to be T1 without the ability to win just by drawing more broken cards than your opponent.  Does no one care about everyone who bought mana drains, workshops, etc. for 1.5!!!  Some one give me a way to contact them, and I urge everyone to fight this.  Please!

Here is the email:

shutupyoufuckingbaby@lickmynutsack.com

I can't take this!
Head pounding!
Someone please give me a way to contact Wizards about this, and everyone who agrees with me, do your part in fighting this.

"Do you hear the people sing?
Singing the song of angry men?"

Sorry but thats been running through my head and I had to write it down

You know this guy is a sissy.  His rallying cry is a line from a musical.  

If you unbanned land tax, parfait would be the monster of 1.5

Scary thought...this guy might be right.  Imagine a format that is so lame that Parfait would the "monster deck."

The new format name should be 1.Neutered

or 1.you wasted money on a stale, lame-ass, now dead format when you bought that playset of Drains.

This was really just a joke, trying to highlight a few of the crazies out there. Most people, even on the Source, seem to recognize that this is the right direction for the format to take.  With this next rotation, there will be more cards you can't play with than those you can (assuming that Vintage does not count).  I think that this new format is a great idea and should replace 1.x.  The current 1.x is just too open to combo domination, without Force of Will.  And really, were duals all that broken?  Now T2 players will see the joys of fetches AND duals.  I can see this format being the new 1.x on the tour.

[jpmeyer]

* jpmeyer changes topic to 'http://www.misetings.com/item/661 <----- 1.5 players'
<jpmeyer> oh and also
<jpmeyer> i have one thing to say to those 1.5 people
<jpmeyer> WELCOME TO WHAT PEOPLE THAT PLAY PTQ FORMATS HAVE EVERY YEAR

I have to say, there is NO WAY that 1.5 would become a PTQ format.  Here's why:

Let's say the Japanese make a broken Diamond Valley deck.  Now, they need to somehow get ahold of Diamond Valley, a card that went out of print 2-3 years before Magic ever came to Japan.

Then, assuming they can somehow get them, they make a great showing at the PT with their Diamond Valley deck and suddenly it's all the rage.  I couldn't possibly comprehend how high the price would get on it.  Think about something like Survival of the Fittest, which is maybe a $15 card that gets a fair amount of play in Type 1.  Exodus had a print run of a little under 200 million cards.  Arabian Nights had a print run of 5 million cards and it would have to supply the worldwide community rather than just a niche market.  I honestly could see something like 5th Dawn having a print run at least 100 times that of Arabian Nights.

[Smmenen]

I have been monitoring the Source over the course of the day and it has blown me away at:

1) the ignorance
2) stupidity
3) bandwagon effect

I don't use those words casually or easily.

The guy who said that "Subpower" card prices would reach the level of Workshop was highly amusing and totally ignorant.  I was particularly amused by the person who described his rage as almost trashing his computer:

At first, I could barely breath.  Then I was MAD.  I spent most of the afternoon feeling sick to my stomach.  Now I just want to wait until Friday.

What makes this a double slap in the face (or actually, more of a blow with a heavy object elsewhere...) is the bannings and unbannings at the same time.  If just Mana Drain, Workshop, metalworker, dragon, and bazaar went away, the format would at least have a starting point to build from.  But with the addition of LED, moxen, and the lotus petels, the format is completely shot.  It will be months before we have an idea of what decks are good, and many months before we redevelop a tier structure.

Also, reading the forum at SCG makes me want to kill people.  I seriously get really...really....mad.  Also, the....person......" my kind won"........ohh, I just see red.  Our format had so many decent people in it......now all of the people saying "oh, do you want to cry about it?" "my  kind won" and other stupid things makes me want to find the addresses of a bunch of people, get together a really large group of 1.5ers....and start a campaign, starting on the east coast and ending at the DCI headquaters in Seattle.....

I suggest taking a bunch of deep breaths and a sedative before reading the SCG forum to avoid damage to your computer.

LOLOLOL.

I was thinking about writing an article about the whole thing - perhaps asking Klown and Saucemaster to help write it - maybe JP too.  I can't beleive how blatently wrong and silly so  much of what is going on over there is.

Think about it for one moment: their entire format is completely disrupted every time a restriction  happens in T1.  Imagine if there were a t0 and as a result of a change in that format, we had Force of Will or Mana Drain banned.  We would be incredibly angry.  I would be upset if I were a 1.5 player that 1.5 was linked to t1, but now they are saying that their format is ruined becuase of the new bannings.  Before this, cards could be banned under circumstances that were completely unrelated to anything 1.5.  

I also like how they talk about Mana Drain or Bazaar as defining features.  We t1 players realize that either card could get the axe at any time.  In fact, there are probalby more people who want Workshop restricted than not.  Talk about losing money...

While I don't want to become the target of a hate mob by writing an article, I think someone else should.  It should be partly sarcastic, but partly suggesting the bright light for t1 by this change.

[jpmeyer]

badplayermeyer: lolololol at this:
badplayermeyer: they want a separate banned list
badplayermeyer: HOW IS WOTC SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT TO MAKE THE BANNED LIST?
badplayermeyer: NONE OF THEM WRITE ARTICLES
badplayermeyer: THEY HAD NO CHOICE BUT TO MAKE IT LIKE EXTENDED

[Smmenen]

Oh, another thing:

I saw PTW's Dragon thread from last fall where he revealed his Dragon deck and how amazing it was and there was like 10 posts after that about how bad that deck was or that it was a joke.  

I'd like to think that we are better than the people on the Source and come along way since we've behaved like that ...

[Jacob Orlove]

While I don't want to become the target of a hate mob by writing an article, I think someone else should.  It should be partly sarcastic, but partly suggesting the bright light for t1 by this change.

I'll throw something together now, but knut might not put it up tomorrow.

[Vegeta2711]

This is a sentence in which "fucking" is functioning as an adjective.

People do that all the time in forums and games so pointing this out as something special... really isn't. The rest of it was pretty good though.

Oh man, doing a list like this with the old T1 B/R list change threads would be just as good though. ^^ I think I'll go reread them, they are almost as bad.

[Jander78]

This is just in response to Ric_Flair's Apoclyptic Visions from the Edge of Hell:

I understand the reasons behind your thoughts about the 1.5 community.  If yesterday was the only day you took a look at the site, then you would have seen quite a mess.  The format was just at a point where people were starting to travel and host decent sized tournaments.  The community as a whole was working together on decks and strategy.  Post were well thought out and organized before this announcement.  I know most of you don't realize the shock factor that took place once the announcement came out.  Imagine how shocking it would be if they banned all of the Type 1 power and staples and un-banned all of the Ante cards to make type 1 a strictly casual format.  I for one didn't look at the announcement until I checked the website and someone made a comment on how a deck was "dead".  Then I realized it was Sept. 1st and thought "oh shit, they banned Workshop!"  I went to the DCI page and realized they just banned the whole format and created a new one, you can hopefully imagine my surprise.  

Anyways, I'm not getting defensive of the thread, because it's really damn funny, but I just don't want the image of 1.5 players to be complete shit.  There is plenty of good talent within the format and you honestly may start seeing a lot of them over on TMD.

Anyways, onto a couple good ones you may have missed:

I have to call it a night.  I have polo at 8 tomorrow, and again at 3.  I hope I wake up and find that this was a nightmare/weird dream.  Maybe not a nightmare, but so many good decks, so many hours of practice.....and the threat of combo winter looming like the threat of MAD in the cold war.

You've gone and fucked her when she didn't want it. You can't un-rape someone, no matter how much you want to.

I guess the next steps for me are the following:

1)  Take a shower.  I feel like the DCI just spooged all over my face when I didn't ask for it......

I posted a link in the scg forums. was that the wrong thing to do?

1.5 wasn't type ones younger brother. It was like they were conjoined twins. Once separate, only one could live.

I didn't know that this site was all THEORY! Why didn't you guys tell me!?

For me, this is the best thing that could have happened. I've been irritated by many of the banned cards, and I'm glad they are gone.

An giant buzzsaw has shot through the forest, and it has chopped down the mighty trees. I was small enough to survive. And now, everything else that survived is as small as me.

And shit, I got like no work done today, and even called off a meeting because of this crap.... damn, now all of your health insurance is going to suffer.

Fuck in the Ass
v. Fucked in the Ass,Fucking in the Ass, Fucks in the Ass
v. tr.
To, in a given format, ban key cards of perfectly fair and possibly sub-par decks while simultanously legalizing cards that will facilitate degenerate decks in a seemingly contradictory manner:
The DCI fucked Type 1.5 in the ass when they killed KoboldKlamp and allowed Long.

Also, I wonder if Colin will commit suicide when he gets back from florida?

If only Dick knew about what is going on...if he does, then we'll bury him too

I don't even know what this means.

I'm actually angry and I rarely get angry (well, unless I'm driving).  This is just way out of line.

Man, now I completly understand the Seinfeld episode, with the Jewish dentist making Jewish jokes.  Honestly, it's ok I play 1.5...........

Later,
Rick

[hulk3rules]

Excuse my ignorance, as I've been out of the loop for a while


What the hell is the source??

[Razvan]

Excuse my ignorance, as I've been out of the loop for a while

What the hell is the source??

http://grexin.shonic.net/cgi-bin/ikonboard.cgi

The 1.5 equivalent of TMD.

[Bram]

I always thought the format was called 1.5 because that's how many people played it. It stands to reason the new name will be T0.0. Hooray!

[Vegeta2711]

I always thought the format was called 1.5 because that's how many people played it. It stands to reason the new name will be T0.0. Hooray!

Wouldn't that mean our format had less people playing it than 1.5 till now?  That's some good logic, mad scientist Bram.

[Hi-Val]

Whoever writes an article needs to make it a joint one from upstanding members of our community, saying "Welcome to T1!"

JP has never been more right; they should have written more articles. Someone should have gotten their ass off The Source and become a regular writer and pound out good material to advance the format. That's what happened at TMD. If SCG won't host them, convince them why or have Z host them.

Anyway, enjoy the new format. I personally like the name "T1.HI-VALOWNED" but it's open to discussion.

And finally, all the complaining about it does nothing but take up time that you could be spending breaking the new format and WINNING THE PRIZE(s).

[kirdape3]

You know, I play a fair amount of 1.5.  And you know what I did as soon as I got home from work the next day?

BUILD NEW DECKS ALL NIGHT LONG, with the desire of a lion surveying a field of wildebeests.  This was the most fun I've had in a long, long time in 1.5.

Sure, there were some whoopsies (a U.S. State Department technical term for a massive fuckup) like randomly letting all those 0cc mana producing artifacts back in a format, but it's not like we can't deal with them efficiently.

I think what everyone's bitching about is how the format is being dragged into Premiere-level terms with a rapidly evolving metagame rather than evolving into it like Type 1 did.