wuaffiliate
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« on: September 18, 2004, 07:46:46 am » |
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I just saw what i believe to be the worst film EVER.
House of the Dead. what utter shit.
1) The actors are the worst ive ever seen, ive seen better acting in a ron jeremy film.
2) they role switch from pussies to ass kicking commando machines.
3) the zombies suck ass, whoever was the art director for this film should be shot.
4) worst storyline ever, if you can call it that.
the movie can be summed up as:
A really fucking bad soap opera with zombies and guns.
Anyone else have warnings for films never to be watched?
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PsychoCid
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« Reply #1 on: September 18, 2004, 07:53:41 am » |
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No, but I have to say that Evil Dead is probably everything House of the Dead isn't.
Weird fogs? Check.
Ash is a pussy in the first movie? Check.
Ash is better in the second movie? Check.
Ash is hardcore badass in Army of Darkness? Double Check.
People turning into freaky-ish demons? Check.
WOMEN GETTING RAPED BY TREES? CHECK CHECK CHECK.
Plus misc. chainsaw and sawed-off shotgun action.
Evil Dead has given me everything I've ever asked for in that line of movie, so that's probably why I never bothered (read: wasted my time) watching House of the Dead.
=)
The originaly HotD game was good, tho. :X
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{Team Hindsight}
{Team Midmorning}
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wuaffiliate
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Team Reflection
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« Reply #2 on: September 18, 2004, 08:02:42 am » |
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Anyone else have warnings for films never to be watched?
dude :lol: |
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Zherbus
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« Reply #3 on: September 18, 2004, 08:46:38 am » |
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Van Helsing... run away.
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Founder, Admin of TheManaDrain.com
Team Meandeck: Because Noble Panther Decks Keeper
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jpmeyer
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« Reply #4 on: September 18, 2004, 09:46:37 am » |
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I didn't see House of the Dead, but everything you said is what I've heard about it. So far, it's MANos.
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Team Meandeck: "As much as I am a clueless, credit-stealing, cheating homo I do think we would do well to consider the current stage of the Vintage community." -Smmenen
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Roxas
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« Reply #5 on: September 18, 2004, 11:44:41 am » |
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Battlefield Earth was pretty bad.
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Jebus
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Corn is no place for a mighty warrior!
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« Reply #6 on: September 18, 2004, 12:01:40 pm » |
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'"Manos" The hands of Fate'
Worst movie EVAR!!1
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Klep
OMG I'M KLEP!
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« Reply #7 on: September 18, 2004, 12:11:38 pm » |
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Battlefield Earth has left me unable to use the word "leverage" with a straight face. Avoid at all costs. True, it can be lots of fun to laugh at terrible films, but it's probably not worth excising a word from your vocabulary.
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So I suppose I should take The Fringe back out of my sig now...
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TracerBullet
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« Reply #8 on: September 18, 2004, 02:48:28 pm » |
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Mr. Wrong.
See, all your films have the redeeming quality of not having Ellen DeGeneres in them.
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The room is on fire, and she's fixin' her hair...
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Shock Wave
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« Reply #9 on: September 18, 2004, 02:58:34 pm » |
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Mr. Wrong.
See, all your films have the redeeming quality of not having Ellen DeGeneres in them. This movie was absolutely terrible, but it still made me laugh a few times. |
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"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat."
- Theodore Roosevelt
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Machinus
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« Reply #10 on: September 18, 2004, 06:07:04 pm » |
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The worst movie of all time is...
Planet of the Apes. The remake. It wasn't a movie. It was a bunch of cracked monkeys that accidentally got filmed and were mistook for actors. This movie is painful, and I am not even going to address the plot. It was a horrible movie on its own; it doesn't need any help from destroying a sci-fi classic.
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T1: Arsenal
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Mith
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« Reply #11 on: September 18, 2004, 06:07:55 pm » |
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ExistenZ sucked my left nut...and did a really bad job at it.
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"Never let your sense of morals keep you from doing what's right."
-Salvor Hardin
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Bram
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I've got mushroom clouds in my hands
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« Reply #12 on: September 19, 2004, 06:29:07 am » |
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I can't decide between 'The Time Machine' and 'The Bourne Supremacy.' These are the sort of films that make me really glad I don't have to pay to get in the movies  |
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<j_orlove> I am semi-religious
<BR4M> I like that. which half of god do you believe in?
<j_orlove> the half that tells me how to live my life
<j_orlove> but not the half that tells me how others should live theirs
R.I.P. Rudy van Soest a.k.a. MoreFling
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Matt
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« Reply #13 on: September 19, 2004, 12:57:58 pm » |
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The Time Machine had that badass part where the glaciers came and melted away, though.
For bad movies, I nominate the Raul Julia special: Overdrawn At The Memory Bank and Street Fighter.
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http://www.goodgamery.com/pmo/c025.GIF---------------------- SpenceForHire2k7: Its unessisary SpenceForHire2k7: only spelled right SpenceForHire2k7: <= world english teach evar ---------------------- noitcelfeRmaeT {Team Hindsight}
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MuzzonoAmi
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« Reply #14 on: September 19, 2004, 01:39:34 pm » |
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Sweet Home Alabama was an abomination. Of course, it's named for the quintessential piece of hillibilly rock, so I probably should've guessed it.
I agree with Matt on Street Fighter, though Wing Commander was an absolute disgrace to the games as well.
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Zvi got 91st out of 178. Way to not make top HALF, you blowhard
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Machinus
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« Reply #15 on: September 19, 2004, 10:06:37 pm » |
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OMFG -
ORIGINAL "privateer" for DOS was the best goddamn space RPG figher game ever. OMFG that game was better than any of the subsequent wing commanders. You had all that awesome stuff for your ship and there were targeting calculators (better than anything from lucasarts). MAN. I hope someone else has played that game...
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T1: Arsenal
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Razvan
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« Reply #16 on: September 20, 2004, 08:34:49 am » |
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I agree with Matt on Street Fighter, though Wing Commander was an absolute disgrace to the games as well. Hear, hear. That movie had to be the worst, just because it really was a blemish on the exellence of the games (including Privateer, one of the best games ever...). The Hurricane, with Denzel Washington, is probably my bottom-feeder as far as movies go... |
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Insult my mother, insult my sister, insult my girlfriend... but never ever use the words "restrict" and "Workshop" in the same sentence...
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jpmeyer
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« Reply #17 on: September 20, 2004, 08:47:34 am » |
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Man, I love Wing Commander something fierce, but oh man, that movie. Using sonar in space...
Like, I've seen a ton of shitty movies but there is a wide, wide gulf between shit like say, Wing Commander or Stepmom and the worst ever, MANos, the Hands of Fate.
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Team Meandeck: "As much as I am a clueless, credit-stealing, cheating homo I do think we would do well to consider the current stage of the Vintage community." -Smmenen
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Womprax
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best.german.ever
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« Reply #18 on: September 20, 2004, 11:37:33 am » |
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Ok.. the 2 worst movies I know are: 1. Habitat. It has like the worst story ever, terrible special effects and everything about this movie just plainly sucks. 2. Daniel, der ZaubererThe movie is from a guy, that got 2nd or 3rd on a german talent show. Picture: NSFWWe even managed to vote it as the worst movie on Imdb.com http://www.daniel-der-zauberer.de/html/bilder.htmlThere you can find some pictures from the movie. This guy so deserves to be shot, he was voted as the most annoying german in all time. NEVER WATCH THIS MOVIE |
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jpmeyer
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« Reply #19 on: September 20, 2004, 02:07:34 pm » |
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You guys don't understand that power of the MANos camp on IMDb. Whenever a movie overtakes MANos, they will rise from the ashes like the mythical phoenix to give that movie hundreds of 10's in order to drop it below MANos. MANos can never be defeated for any extended portion of time.
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Team Meandeck: "As much as I am a clueless, credit-stealing, cheating homo I do think we would do well to consider the current stage of the Vintage community." -Smmenen
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Matt
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« Reply #20 on: September 20, 2004, 05:22:40 pm » |
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I think you have to discriminate between movies that tried to be good but were actually fathered by demons (Congo) and movies that were never intended to be good (anything on MST3K, including Manos).
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http://www.goodgamery.com/pmo/c025.GIF---------------------- SpenceForHire2k7: Its unessisary SpenceForHire2k7: only spelled right SpenceForHire2k7: <= world english teach evar ---------------------- noitcelfeRmaeT {Team Hindsight}
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ctthespian
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« Reply #21 on: September 20, 2004, 09:34:08 pm » |
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Cold Creek Manor has to be one of the only movies I walked out of the theatres while watching. That movie was just bad.
-Keith
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Alpha Underground Sea = $200
Alpha Black Lotus = $1000
Knowing that I can build almost any deck in T1 and have it be black bordered. = Priceless
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Magi
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« Reply #22 on: September 21, 2004, 12:05:12 am » |
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I believe I own a VHS of the worst movie ever. I will type up what it says on the back: Meet Rose, the victim of a brutal gang rape who is out for revenge. She starts her own diamond smuggling business in the hopes of finding her attackers. After several years, she is finally invited to join the international smuggling ring that was responsible for her attack. Now, using a deadly combination of street smarts and seduction, she is eliminating her attackers one by one.
But at the same time, a highly trained band of ninjas who are also Interpol agents are after the smuggling gang she just joined. Among this band of ninjas is her former fiancee, who abandoned her after she was attacked. He's still in love with Rose, despite the fact that he is now married to the daughter of a wealthy local businessman. He wants to win Rose back by helping her get revenge...even though he is also on her hit list!
Exciting martial arts action combines with suspense in this thriller that builds up to a surprising climax that will leave you guessing until the very end! Ninja's who are ALSO Interpol Agents?@!!?!?!(one) here's the IMDB link http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081236/I'm crying just reading the review...shit haven't laughed this hard in a while, and I've had this movie for half a year Still in its plastic wrapping. $2.66 at Wal-Mart, I bought it entirely for the novelty. Never ever going to open it.  It hasn't made the 100 worst movies despite having a much lower score than many many movies on the 100 worst list because it didn't get enough votes. It's not even good enough for minor cult status! EDIT: I found a picture I took long ago of the cover pictaranother edit: I just realized, Godrey Ho directed DOZENS of movies like this. Just click on his name in the imdb link to get a full list. Oh dear I have tears in my eyes just reading some of the comments on these movies. I've been laughing so hard for the past 30 minutes I can't feel my lips. |
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Nameless
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« Reply #23 on: September 21, 2004, 08:41:22 am » |
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I went to the link about that movie and a review said: User Comments: Made from real ninja movie parts! -LOL- Yea, you were right, some of these really are pretty damn funny. |
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"I weep for noone, and noone weeps for me."
"Anger cannot be dishonest." - Marcus Aurelius, 121-180 AD
(Brought to you by the Department of Redundancy Department.)
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Bram
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I've got mushroom clouds in my hands
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« Reply #24 on: September 22, 2004, 03:10:53 am » |
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Someone gave me 'Stacy (Attack Of The Schoolgirl Zombies)' for my birthday. It's a japanese gore flick about...well, you can guess what it's about. It's pretty bad, in a good way.
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<j_orlove> I am semi-religious
<BR4M> I like that. which half of god do you believe in?
<j_orlove> the half that tells me how to live my life
<j_orlove> but not the half that tells me how others should live theirs
R.I.P. Rudy van Soest a.k.a. MoreFling
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jpmeyer
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« Reply #25 on: September 23, 2004, 05:07:51 pm » |
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I bought this on Amazon for $2 and gave it to a friend for his birthday. It was bad enough that it went past bad to good but kept going and went back to bad. I mean, it looked cool at first! I thought it was gonna be like Jesus vs. the Illuminati! |
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Team Meandeck: "As much as I am a clueless, credit-stealing, cheating homo I do think we would do well to consider the current stage of the Vintage community." -Smmenen
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DavidHernandez
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« Reply #26 on: September 24, 2004, 08:25:15 am » |
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...and Time Machine had the awesome part where the Moon blows up...which made the film almost worthwhile.
I have to agree with Battlefield Earth as the worst movie ever. One of the "hero's" ends up having to blow himself to atoms to 'save the earth', but there was so little character development that when I saw this, i didn't care that he was going to die. I even laughed. It went something like this: "oh look, he's making a face like pressing the button is a big deal...and then he presses it...and I'm laughing my head off because I'm glad to see him go..."
Since Battlefield Earth is already taken, avoid Water World starring Kevin Costner. What a waste.
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I will find a way -- or make one. Check out my wife! www.DanceKitten.comTeam GRO- Ours are bigger than yours. Card Carrying Member: Team Mindtrick Best.Fortune.Cookie.Ever: "Among the lucky, you are the chosen one." |
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Matt
Post like a butterfly, Mod like a bee.
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« Reply #27 on: September 24, 2004, 03:51:28 pm » |
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The part where Costner goes underwater and you see the sunken cities was tight. And not only because there was no talking.
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http://www.goodgamery.com/pmo/c025.GIF---------------------- SpenceForHire2k7: Its unessisary SpenceForHire2k7: only spelled right SpenceForHire2k7: <= world english teach evar ---------------------- noitcelfeRmaeT {Team Hindsight}
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Triple_S
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« Reply #28 on: September 24, 2004, 07:09:25 pm » |
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I fell asleep on the couch at my girlfriends apartment...when I woke up she had You Got Served on...the nightmares that ensued were hideous...
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Team Shortbus--newly reconstituted
Kicking you in the ovaries since 1975.
Team Short Bus: bastard covered bastards with bastard filling
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Mykeatog
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« Reply #29 on: September 27, 2004, 09:26:11 am » |
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Alright, so none of you have ever seen...
artificial Intelligence. check.
Oy-- that movie was so bad, it made 'star wars' look good.
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Free Agent
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