(Banned on Star City!) Review of Bleiweiss' Type I Review

[rakso]

Background

-----Original Message-----
From: Ted Knutson
Sent: Monday, September 27, 2004 8:19 AM
To: Oscar Tan
Cc: 'Philip Stanton'; The Ferrett
Subject: Re: Column Addendum

Nope, not happening.  Post it on TMD if you like, but as I said, I'm not revisiting this on our website because whatever form it takes will be the starting point for another flame war, and I'm much more interested in Champions right now than I am with you taking shots at Bleiweiss for something that was clearly messaged hyperbole in every sense, is 4 months old, and has already been explained multiple times.

Ted Knutson
Managing Editor, StarCityGames.com
 
----- Original Message -----
From: Oscar Tan
To: 'Ted Knutson'
Cc: 'Philip Stanton'
Sent: Sunday, September 26, 2004 8:14 PM
Subject: RE: Column Addendum

Well, boss, the reason isn’t so much that we want to call attention to Ben’s accuracy or inaccuracy. It’s just that he brazenly writes his Type I set review in such a way that he wanted the community to react to him, and you still remember him calling people idiots in his Fifth Dawn article. For CHK, he wrote the intro that while everyone criticized his Fifth Dawn critique, he was right on the money except for All Suns’ Dawn, and that sounded like an open challenge.

I haven’t explicitly cited JP’s (or anyone else’s) CHK review because I haven’t violently disagreed with anything in those yet. I actually did a couple of times, but I took out the quotes I made because they didn’t add anything, whether I agreed or said something different. Sure, no one enjoys a high accuracy in these set reviews, but that’s hardly the point we wanted to make.

If you think it’s stirring shit, I respect your decision of course, but I thought I was trying to be funny while poking a hole at an ego bubble that had a bunch of Type I people riled up.

So as not to waste Phil’s efforts, I’d ask to be allowed to tone it down to your specifications, or just chuck it into my next regular column as a letter by Phil to me.

Thanks,
Oscar

"It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul."
     --Invictus, William Ernest Henley

The Banned Review of Ben Bleiweiss' Type I Reviews
COLUMN:   You CAN Play Type I #141 Addenudum
TITLE:   Championing Kamigawa, Interlude
AUTHOR:   Oscar Tan aka Rakso   

Deep in a secluded cave den on the exotic plane of Kamigawa, a mysterious figure wearing a fox fur hat sits at a dimly lit computer console.

“Damn, I wish I were playing Netrunner instead. I’d trade a Ravager for Broadband access right now.�

The desired website finally loads before the impatient almond-eyed planeswalker.

“Ah, good. JP Meyer’s report is up… what is… this?�

Mr. Bleiweiss v. Vintage?

Whirling in fury, he flips open an old binder… er… tome containing the wisdom of the ancients.

“This is the clown who predicted the domination of All Suns’ Dawn!�

Sure enough, the faded runes on the page read:

“All Suns' Dawn

“This spell is expensive. It also has a massively game-swinging effect.

“Returning up to five cards at once to your hand is major, and All Suns' Dawn is easily splashable in any deck that would want to return five colors of cards to their hand. Initially, I see a majority of Type One players pooh-poohing this spell as it requires five mana to cast. They are idiots, plain and simple. Keeper can easily run a copy of this in their deck, and use it to get back:

“A) Demonic Tutor/Mind Twist
B) Force of Will/Mana Drain/Ancestral Recall/Brokenness
C) Balance/Swords to Plowshares/Decree of Justice/Dismantling Blow
D) Fire / Ice and Gorilla Shaman
E) Okay, so there are no good Green targets here except for Regrowth.

“Either way, the two-to-four for one on this card is pretty major, and this card should be given a good, hard look.�

(see “18,000 Words: Some Words About Fifth Dawn in Type One�)

A heavy fist slams on the page.

“Enough! Lackeeeeeeeyyyyyyy!!!�

Azusa, Lost But Seeking, walks out of the monitor. Startled, the planeswalker hurls his Type I deck at it, dispelling it, but sending several pounds of hard plastic straight into the now shattered monitor.

“Never mind. Glensoooooonnnnnn!!!�

From out of nowhere, a shifty Nezumi appears, ready to do his master’s bidding.

“I’m taking a contract out on Bleiweiss. Get me the Paragons.�

The trusty Glenson Lim, however, scratches his head and flicks his tail.

“Erhm, boss… Darren Di Battista is busy running around in tights and waving fiberglass sabers around. Matt D’Avanzo is still posing as a teacher and scoping out all the hot preteens in New York’s high schools. And…�

The master roars in impatience.

“…and Meyer is still busy stage managing the fake Paragon split and raking in the side bets on the Short Bus v. Mean Deck spat.�

Glenson whips out an expensive PDA phone and plays a video clip from an old M.A.S.K. episode. Straight from the 80’s, Matt Trakker’s voice intones the magic words:

“… give me the agents best suited for this mission.�

The master smiles malevolently as a single familiar face appears on the small LCD…

Moments later, the designated assassin reports success.

-----Original Message-----
From: Philip Stanton
Sent: Thursday, September 23, 2004 7:20 AM
To: Oscar Tan
Subject: Re: Mission Bleiweiss
 
All Fifth Dawn appearances in my results:

June (last ten days)

3 Crucible of Worlds
1 Staff of Domination
1 Silent Arbiter

July (9 tournies)

41 Crucible of Worlds
18 Staff of Domination
4 Night's Whisper
3 Synod Centurion
2 Goblin Cannon
2 Tel-Jilad Justice
1 Engineered Explosives
1 Razormane Masticore
1 Silent Arbiter

August (5 tournies)

41 Crucible of Worlds
2 Serum Visions

September has not yet been compiled, but hilariously, the Salvagers deck here (http://www.themanadrain.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=19561) has no Artificer's Intuition in it.

Bleiweiss predicted these as winners:

Night's Whisper
Plunge Into Darkness
Shattered Dreams
Artificer's Intuition ("best card")
Serum Visions
All Suns' Dawn
Eternal Witness
Auriok Salvagers
Steelshaper's Gift
Blasting Station
Grinding Station
Crucible of Worlds (September does have a Turboland deck, but this is
   mostly appearing in control)
Engineered Explosives
Krark-Clan Ironworks

JP's prediction, for comparison
(http://www.themanadrain.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=17469):

"While Night's Whisper, Engineered Explosives, and Serum Visions are the only cards that I think SHOULD see play, there are a lot of cards that probably will see play anyway.

"Here's 6 more to get up to 5%:

Tel-Jilad Justice
Synod Centurion
Auriok Salvagers
Crucible of Worlds
Blind Creeper
Krak-Clan Ironworks (I missed this one. It might have potential)"

So JP was mostly right, and Ben was mostly wrong. Plus, I stand by my belief that Ben's review was counterproductively antagonistic, even though I probably overreacted a bit in the forum thread, where I went pretty berserk on him.

I hope that helps!
--
Philip Stanton


Token Desert note

Not all of my China trip photos reflected the local culture. Some were just the result of several hundred overseas Chinese students goofing off together. For example, imagine a couple hundred of you bunked in a unisex train, in triple bunks, together with mainland Chinese. You can carry on a good Intellectual Property Law conversation with the Hong Kong law student in the top bunk, while everyone walks underneath you.



The plane trip from the desert back to Beijing was even nuttier, and some of the local Chinese students were singing what seemed to be a fusion of Mandarin rap and rock songs in the aisle.



Finally, this is one of my most memorable photos. It’s the only evidence I have of anything intellectually productive in the ten-day trip (that’s half a day spent discussing law and economics, and nine and a half spent goofing off, do the math).



Till next week! I hope!

Oscar Tan (e-mail: Rakso at StarCityGames.com)
rakso on #BDChat on EFNet
Paragon of Vintage
University of the Philippines, College of Law
Forum Administrator, Star City Games
Featured Writer, Star City Games
Author of the Control Player's Bible
Maintainer, Beyond Dominia (R.I.P.)
Proud member of the Casual Player's Alliance
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[WildWillieWonderboy]

Yeah, I guess Bleiweiss just shouldn't comment on formats he has never played or been involved in, but anyone could've told you that.

Best thing about this post: Balance not only fixes $+4KS, but Chinese economy too. Where do the uses end?

[LotusHead]

The Salvagers deck listed did not "hilariously" have Artificer's Intuition in it because Artificer's Intuition simply does not chump block OR do Trinket beats for the win.

Anyone who rocks with Salvagers has figured that out.

Glad to see Salvager decks posting nice wins in "big" tournies.

[Toad]

[wuaffiliate]

Anyone who rocks with Salvagers is a donkey fellator

[Meddling Mike]

hehe, all sun's dawn, like any control deck worth it's salt would ever screw around with it's mana base further to include that piece of jank.  If I'm paying five to cast a sorcery speed spell in a control deck it better say "win the game" on it, or something pretty damn close. Nice job putting Ben in his place Rasko.

[VGB]

hehe, all sun's dawn, like any control deck worth it's salt would ever screw around with it's mana base further to include that piece of jank.  If I'm paying five to cast a sorcery speed spell in a control deck it better say "win the game" on it, or something pretty damn close. Nice job putting Ben in his place Rasko.

To be fair, Mana Drain exists in T1, which theoretically makes it castable for just G or thereabouts.  Also, Keeper can support the G cost, as the base currently includes more Cities to combat Titan (in metas where Titan is applicable, at least).

Wu, look here.

[Klep]

Glad to see Salvager decks posting nice wins in "big" tournies.

I'm not, because it's a terrible deck.

[Mr. Channel-Fireball]

Return that Michigan shirt; you are not worthy.

[CHA1N5]

Return that Michigan shirt; you are not worthy.

Seriously.  I'll send you an OSU shirt.

[rakso]

Actually, I DID want an OSU shirt. My cousin (as in, an older cousin, in her sixties, so I should say aunt) promised me an Ohio shirt after I visited them in Ohio. I guess they were sold out because I got a Michigan shirt instead, but who am I to complain?

[Smmenen]

Hell yeah!!

OSU

[rakso]

Seriously, I have a cousin-in-law studying in OSU, so if only for that, my relatives insisted that I couldn't leave Ohio without making the pilgrimage to the Buckeyes stadium. I wrote about it in my column when I was there last summer (summer in Manila being May).

I wanted to get some OSU apparel from the university store, but the exchange rate sucked. I couldn't even get OSU lingerie to give as a present.

[WildWillieWonderboy]

Actually, I DID want an OSU shirt. My cousin (as in, an older cousin, in her sixties, so I should say aunt) promised me an Ohio shirt after I visited them in Ohio. I guess they were sold out because I got a Michigan shirt instead, but who am I to complain?

Sir, you have every right to complain, as you got shafted with an article of clothing that forces you to endorse The OSU's archrival and diametric opposite, which by default makes you appear as a bad person. Wow, three OSU-centric posts.

[rakso]

So they have to pay me to wear it, eh?

Hmmmm. My only problem is that I met a cute Michigan State med student in China, and I had the shirt with me at the time.

I don't want to discuss the mathematics of cute Michigan State med student > forum full of horny Ohio Magic players.

::ducks::

[Smmenen]

Seriously, I have a cousin-in-law studying in OSU, so if only for that, my relatives insisted that I couldn't leave Ohio without making the pilgrimage to the Buckeyes stadium. I wrote about it in my column when I was there last summer (summer in Manila being May).

I wanted to get some OSU apparel from the university store, but the exchange rate sucked. I couldn't even get OSU lingerie to give as a present.

Um.  That's where I'm studying law .

[rakso]

Really??? But remember, I told you last March I'd be heading over to Ohio? I thought you were still in the UK!

[MixedkNuts]

This is the e-mail that Oscar DIDN'T quote, which explains why I told him I wouldn't publish his article in the first place.

Oscar,

I'm not printing this because it's simply you simply stirring shit.  Using Ben as the lodestone around which you base your own Vintage set review is silly anyway (why no mention of JP's CHK review (or anyone else who is more qualified) in your own?), but this goes too far. I can see this quickly degenerating into people going into your archives and flogging you for every time you've been too pessimistic in your own reviews and completely missed a format-changing card for Keeper alone (Was Decree of Justice in your Scourge set review?  How about Exalted Angel in Onslaught? You at least nailed Psychatog on the head as one of the best creatures ever in your Odyssey set review, right?  Right?). Everyone knows that Geordie missed Wake and the Wishes, Elliot Fertik missed Oath of Druids, and Bleiweiss was completely wrong about Artificer's Intuition.

 

The horse is dead, let it lie.

--Knut

[Mr. Channel-Fireball]

Writing a spot-on set review is like posting a "No Pissing" section in a public swimming pool.