Would you...

[CrazyCarl]

Attend a tourney who's first place prize was a COW?

Now, you could just not take the cow home and get a piece of power, but you could also get a picture of you and the cow to bring home as a memento.  We could frame it and everything.

[Matt]

I thought it was Crucible of Worlds.

[Komatteru]

Only if it's foil.  Or Beta.

[nataz]

yes.

And then have a HUGE BAR-BQ

[Smmenen]

Attend a tourney who's first place prize was a COW?

Now, you could just not take the cow home and get a piece of power, but you could also get a picture of you and the cow to bring home as a memento.  We could frame it and everything.

The best thing about Cows is that they are fucking delicious. 

Now put up a little puppy as a prize - or a Parrot and I very well might want some of that tournament action. 

[Mykeatog]

mmm.... cow sex.

[Matt]

The best thing about Cows is that they are fucking delicious. 
Now put up a little puppy as a prize - or a Parrot and I very well might want some of that tournament action. 

Now I'd always heard lawyers were evil, but eating a puppy? Is that how they prep you for the bar exam?

[Smmenen]

The best thing about Cows is that they are fucking delicious. 
Now put up a little puppy as a prize - or a Parrot and I very well might want some of that tournament action. 

Now I'd always heard lawyers were evil, but eating a puppy? Is that how they prep you for the bar exam?

I bet puppies taste like sweet chicken.

No seriously, I want a pet dog badly.  I'm a dog man.  Cats are too upitty.  If anyone knows where I can get an adorable little pug, give me their number. 

[Outlaw]

What about a prize of a baby accompanied by a woodchipp..... maybe I should stop before im Baninated.

[dandan]

A Cow as a prize? Pull the udder one!

[Green Knight]

No, my back yard is much too small for a cow. Perhaps a goat would be happy, but I need a few more acres for the bovine. Now if it included the slaughter of the animal and it was packaged into nice steaks/roasts I’d be in (of course I’d need a bigger freezer and the BBQ would be at my place!).
What would you call that tourney? The Animal-Drain Open? The after party would be "Cattle-Bury" (it’d be roasted underground obviously).

[CrazyCarl]

The best thing about Cows is that they are fucking delicious. 
Now put up a little puppy as a prize - or a Parrot and I very well might want some of that tournament action. 

Now I'd always heard lawyers were evil, but eating a puppy? Is that how they prep you for the bar exam?

I bet puppies taste like sweet chicken.

No seriously, I want a pet dog badly.  I'm a dog man.  Cats are too upitty.  If anyone knows where I can get an adorable little pug, give me their number. 

That's nothing.

Imagine... DOLPHIN STEAKS!!!  I'm sure they're outlawed for a reason.  Panda bear bacon might be good as well, and you KNOW whales have to taste good.

[TracerBullet]

For no explicable reason, I can say truthfully that I've actually eaten whale meat, and that it's not all it's made out to be.  Not like manatees... Whoever said cows are tasty, just wait till you try the sea cow!

[nataz]

For no explicable reason, I can say truthfully that I've actually eaten whale meat

ditto, but I found it to be excellent. It was minki and I was in jappo land btw. Dolphin is similar in texture, but more chewy.

Not that I do this often, but the opportunity came up, and I had to try it.

[Komatteru]

This thread has gone from bizzare to kinda disturbing...

[CF]

For no explicable reason, I can say truthfully that I've actually eaten whale meat, and that it's not all it's made out to be.  Not like manatees... Whoever said cows are tasty, just wait till you try the sea cow!

There are very many variants of whale meat and most are ickily prepared (marinated in vinegar something for who knows what reasons), so that seems like a nasty generalisation. I used to think the exact same way until I have some -awesome- whale meat. It's probably like saying cow meat is overrated after having a hamburger.

--
Chris

[Dozer]

A Cow as a prize? Pull the udder one!

That made my day.

As for the whale meat, I once had whale barbecue when I was in Norway, way back in 1995... I remember it as being somewhat tasty and similar to beef in texture, but not better than beef and certainly not better than venison. Does whale count as venison?

Dozer

[Smmenen]

For no explicable reason, I can say truthfully that I've actually eaten whale meat, and that it's not all it's made out to be.  Not like manatees... Whoever said cows are tasty, just wait till you try the sea cow!

There are very many variants of whale meat and most are ickily prepared (marinated in vinegar something for who knows what reasons), so that seems like a nasty generalisation. I used to think the exact same way until I have some -awesome- whale meat. It's probably like saying cow meat is overrated after having a hamburger.

--
Chris

I think if there is one animal that I am disturbed about eating, it would be whale or dolphin.  I watched a documentary on Discovery channel sometime back in which they observed the behavior of Whales closely.  I respect them too much to eat whale and I despise you damn whalers!  Bah Norway!  Down with Whaling!

[Matt]

So, Smmenen, would you eat a monkey?

[Smmenen]

eat a monkey?  I'd eagerly devour one - just so long as its not an orangatang - those things are too damned human like. 

[Ephraim]

eat a monkey?  I'd eagerly devour one - just so long as its not an orangatang - those things are too damned human like. 

Are you implying, sir, that you would not eat a human? This is not the Smmenen I know!

[Kowal]

There are better things to do with human corpses than eat them.  Eating them should only occur if you're really, REALLY hungry, and there's not a taco bell within walking distance.

[Bram]

I thought it was Crucible of Worlds

Seconded. And I feel the need to add to this that I'm kind of ashamed that this was my first association.

As far as I'm concerned animals = food. I've always wanted to own the shirt in the following vintage picture of the band SS Decontrol. Eating endangered species, however, is not kosher.

[Jacob Orlove]

Eating endangered species, however, is not kosher.

Actually, some of them are. Not that I'd eat them.

Of the various animals listed in this thread, though, the following aren't kosher:
Whales
Dolphins
Monkeys, Orangutans, etc.
Dogs
Pandas
Parrots (probably all of them, definitely some of them)
People
and Lawyers :p

[Smmenen]

I honeslty wouldn't eat a monkey - that's nasty.  Ugh. 

[The M.E.T.H.O.D]

BUT THEY DID IT IN INDIANA JONES!!

[nataz]

but monkeys look sooo tasty!

btw, what exactly makes something kosher?

[Jacob Orlove]

btw, what exactly makes something kosher?

Basically, there are some sections in Leviticus that spell out what we can and can't eat. If we can, it's Kosher. If we can't, it isn't Kosher.

[Saucemaster]

Follow-up question, because I'm too lazy to actually read the relevant sections of Leviticus: w/r/t animals that were unknown to the Jews at the time (e.g... llamas, or alpacas), who decides whether or not it's kosher?  I remember there being some generalized rules, but I dont' remember exactly what they are.  Also, what about unprecedented things, like marsupials?  And, if we were to meet some particularly delicious aliens who had totally different biological structures than we did, who would get to decide?

Thank you, and I'll take my answer off the air.

[Jacob Orlove]

For some animals, there are general rules as to whether or not you can eat it. Fish, for example, are okay if they have scales, but not if they don't (so shellfish, dolphins, etc. are out). Land animals need a cloven hoof and to chew their cud (no rabbits, pigs, etc.). For birds, there's a whole long list of the ones you can't eat, so there's been some extreme debates over the years about both new species and exactly what species each name they used refers to. Chicken, duck, and turkey are all okay, but all the raptors and scavengers are definitely out. I'd probably stay away from random other birds too, just on principle, although I think there are some more allowed ones (possibly doves and pigeons). There's also some rules for insects and bugs, but I don't plan on eating any of those anyway.

Oh, and then there are the other Kosher laws, dealing with the slaughtering of the animals and the preparation of the food, but I won't get into that except to say that's where the no mixing milk and meat part comes from.

edit: no idea on reptiles or amphibians, except I know frogs are not kosher.